This.

I don’t know why this video is making the rounds today, as it’s date stamped over a year ago, but here’s a grown woman at a ballpark ripping a discarded baseball out of the hands of a youngster and then high-fiving her fans for her courageous act.

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I had a paragraph here that totally attributed the woman’s behavior to stereotypical behavior, but that type of language would have been a wild generalization that probably was unfair on my behalf. I’ll share three keywords though: Hummer, sunglasses, McMansion.

It’d be a hoot of someone really identified the selfish woman.

~~~

The Pasterasti, or whatever the head of Barilla Pasta is called, made some unkind remarks about gays and how they would never be featured in marketing of Barilla Pasta, because they don’t fit the Barilla sense of family and a woman’s central role. Reuters has a news article here, Huffington Post has an article here. There has been a call by some LGBT groups to boycott Barilla and I fully support this boycott. (I believe my husband will support it as well, I just can’t speak on his behalf at the moment). I just checked the cupboards and we have no Barilla products at The Manor, nor will we in the future. Since the Pasterasti urged gays to get their pasta elsewhere, we’ll do just that. Thanks for the heads up, asshat!

Indecisive.

Since Earl and I worked late tonight, we decided that tonight would be our night out on the town. Knowing this all day long, my mouth was watering for a steak and blue cheese salad wedge entree at a local restaurant, Carmella’s in neighboring New Hartford. I believe there are a couple of Carmella’s in Central New York. The other one close to us is called Babe’s.

Earl and I were seated in the farthest corner in a booth near the waitress congregation area. Menus were placed on our designated table and a non-committal hostess flung some fingers in the general direction of the corner. I sat facing the corner, Earl faced the dining room.

After about three minutes we set our menus down and were ready for someone to stop by the table to welcome us to Carmella’s and to take our order.

A few more minutes passed.

Earl observed servers coming and going from the Church of the Poison Mind server congregating area, and while they appeared to be quite engaged with one another, they didn’t seem like they wanted to really mingle with the customers.

As Earl observed this, I listened to the woman in the booth behind me bellow out something about boxed wine and asking her mother how she got home from her 17th birthday party years ago because she was so wasted she didn’t remember. Ah, the good ol’ days.

At T+12 minutes Earl looked at as I gazed back at him and we both said it at the same time: “Do you want to get out of here”? Now, years ago when we said that, we bee-lined back to a hotel room and did the nasty, but it’s been several years and we’ve been married a long time so instead we went to another restaurant.

We settled on the local Olive Garden, which had its grand opening last month. As we walked through the front doors, all expectations of Olive Garden familiarity dissipated as we realized this wasn’t your grandma’s Olive Garden. The “curvy” feel of the room layouts and the bar and passageways to the dining areas that flank the breezeway were absent, our local restaurant has four square dining rooms chocked full of tables and booths. Not only could you barely move in the place, it was loud. Very loud. Like, high school lunch room table in the far corner loud.

A very nice server named Amanda greeted us, and despite her creepy inclinations of coming up behind Earl and asking him questions over his shoulder, she was pleasant and knew what she was doing.

To our side was a table of eight that were celebrating someone’s birthday with all you can eat salad. They must have had four bowls of salad and breadsticks, bring more breadsticks. It went on and on. The four sitting along the wall (next to me) all smoked; they exited and reappeared frequently and at random intervals. At first I thought the birthday celebration might involve a game of duck-duck-goose, but no, they were just going out front to smoke.

Off of Earl’s left shoulder was a young couple with four boys that appeared to be ages 0, 1 and 2. They had a couple of strollers and a car seat flung about. Mom was breast feeding one of her children. I believe it was the youngest one.

Earl and I focused on each other with concentrated eyes and ears to weed out the sights and sounds surrounding us. Again, years ago, this would have invoked the nasty, but we were hungry.

Earl’s entree came out, I believe it was a steak gorgonzola over fettuccine. The gorgonzola was plopped into the center of the fettuccine and apparently had qualms about being over the steak. I ordered a gumbo thing that was on their healthy menu which was fairly good except it was wicked salty to the point that if someone licked me right now they would find me Satisfrying.

When Earl was asked about his meal by the pleasant Amanda, he let her know his disappointment with the gorgonzola plop. She was taken aback and spoke to the manager about it. Apparently the proof is in the plop and it’s actually suppose to come that way, but since he was disappointed the manager took it off the bill and offered us free dessert.

When my pumpkin cheesecake arrived, one of the smokey eight asked me what I was eating and then the smokey mother next to him started proclaiming loudly, “Oh my god, it’s so big! That’s a huge piece of cheesecake! It’s a meal in itself! My god, he’s going to eat it all! All of it! He’s eating it!”

It’s a good thing I’m not a shrinking wallflower.

After we ate the whole thing and left Amanda a generous tip for “handling our disappointment gracefully” (she should kiss us, should we see her again), we headed over to the mall to do laps.

Verizon-Wireless

Now Jamie’s iPhone 4S is in rough shape. It has had a good run, but honestly, one of the buttons is broke, it won’t hold a charge and he’s constantly running out of storage space since it’s the 16GB model. He’s due for an upgrade, so after some debating, we ordered him a new iPhone 5c, which we will take with us to Chicago when we visit him next month.

I fondled the HTC One and Moto X, both Android phones. Mike at this Verizon Wireless1 was very friendly and it turns out that he’s the nephew of a friend of ours and he remembered us as “J.P. and Earl that drive the Jeep” (told you we were famous) so he let me play around with the Android phones.

I was going to buy it.

I’ll do another lap around the mall.

I’m thinking about it.

Let me do another lap.

“What phone do you use”? He carries a Nokia 720 something Windows phone. It’s OK.

Let me do another lap.

“I’ll take the Moto X.”

He says, “here, play around with this while I get you set up in the computer.”

I play around with the phone. I like it. I can’t test some of the cooler features because it has to be programmed with my voice and only my voice. Something just doesn’t feel right. It’s smooth but it doesn’t feel premium. It’s good. It’s great. But it doesn’t knock my socks off.

Swipe. Swipe. I flick my wrist to activate the camera. Swipe some more. Something is not right. I feel like a disturbance is brewing in the force, or worse yet, the transporter beam is orange instead of white.

All of a sudden I start sweating. I yell “Stop!!!!!”

He looks at me.

“I’m not ready to make the switch.”

He packs up his toys and continues to smile, giving us his phone number. If we have any questions we can text him.

Earl is visibly relieved.

Still shaken, I caress my familiar iPhone 5. “I still love you, baby.” I’m talking to the phone, not Earl.

Jamie’s new phone arrives next week and I’ve decided to keep my iPhone 5. To celebrate, we stop at Burger King for a diet pop and nothing more. Feeling outgoing, I ask the counter person about the Satisfries. She says they’re delicious. She didn’t offer a sample and I didn’t ask.

I’ll pass until another time.

1 Mike at Verizon Wireless in Sangertown Square is a really good guy and will work with you to get the best bang for your buck. If you see him, tell him “J.P. and Earl in the Jeep” sent you.

Satisfries.

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Last night I was watching the evening news when Brian Williams announced a “major fast-food industry break through, after the break.” I was intrigued enough to sit through commercials and see what was involved with this major breakthrough.

Yesterday, Burger King restaurants across the United States began selling “Satisfries”. As a new addition to their menu, Satisfries are touted as a healthier alternative to the traditional french fries that remain on Burger King’s menu.

Burger King won’t divulge what changes they made to the recipe that makes these fries, but the did tell that they use the same potatoes, cut to the same size as the traditional offerings and that they use the same oil to fry the Satisfries. There’s something different about the batter, apparently they’ve shifted ratio of ingredients around a bit, and the result is the batter is thinner and it doesn’t hold as much oil.

The result? 30% less fat and 20% less calories than BK’s regular fries.

While I am trying really hard to avoid fast food and, for that matter, fried food, I must admit that I am probably intrigued enough to give these Satisfries a try this weekend. At first I was going to avoid these things at all cost, as I was certain that there were secret ingredients like O-Lean (Olestra) involved and I certainly don’t want to relive the experimental no-fat Lays incident of 1995.

Burger King has been at this new recipe for a decade. I figure if I don’t feel satisfied with Satisfries, I can feed them to the seagulls that seem to be always hanging around at BK.

Source information from USA Today.

Ride.

So on Saturday I went for my third “long” bike ride of the season. Having already ridden west and southwest on my previous rides this season, I decided to head to the southeast towards the relatively famous village of Cooperstown and then onto the nearby city of Oneonta. I knew the ride was going to be a challenge because that’s hilly country down there. While I know that hills are a part of the whole cycling experience, if I were to be completely honest I’d have to admit that I’d rather ride on the Great Plains or the Salt Flats.

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The weather forecast mentioned thunderstorms and showers on Saturday and I was lucky to remain dry for the entire duration of the ride. What I didn’t factor in, however, was that the approaching front was kicking up some winds. After getting to the top of a particular challenging climb (where a bunch of Amish kids stopped their chores and smiled and waved at me, helping me feel better), I found myself pedaling as hard as I could and barely moving forward. I was struggling to keep the bike upright. It turns out I was riding in 30 MPH gusts.

Good times.

I burned through my snack packs and found myself craving calories as I continued to defy the wind and ended up stopping at a quaint little place called the Fly Creek General Store. As I slurped down a Muscle Milk and chowed down on a Clif Bar, I noticed that I had an unread text message on my iPhone.

Due to the iOS 7 upgrades to our phones, Earl could no longer find me on “Find My Friends”. Yay for progress!

I sent him a text message telling him to start driving on Route 28 south of Cooperstown and he’d find me down there. I told him that I was ready to call it a day whenever he found me.

A while later, my Knight in Shining Armor (well, a black Jeep) arrived.

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When all was said and done, I rode 52.26 miles in 4 hours and 50 minutes. My average speed was 10.8 MPH, well below the 13-14 MPH average I usually clock in at.

While I enjoyed my ride (I always enjoy time on my bike), I told Earl that Saturday’s ride was the least favorite of my long distance rides this season. He understood that but reminded me that I still rode a pretty good distance in the wind. Apparently while trying to find me he had ridden through some windy weather in the Jeep.

I’m looking forward to one more long ride before the snow flies.

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Lightbulb.

So a few months ago I thought I would take the extra step to reduce our carbon footprint here at The Manor. We have recessed lighting throughout most of the house and our old incandescent indoor flood lights were starting to burn out in a curiously methodical fashion. When it came to return the bulbs, I “thought green”, did the research online and went with natural daylight CFL bulbs from Lowe’s. The bulbs in question are made by Utilitech.

I talked about this project right here on this blog back in June.

One of the reasons I went with the Utilitech brand was because they were touted to be at nearly full brightness when powered on. Many CFL bulbs require a warm up period and I have to tell you, this drives me insane. Since CFL bulbs are allegedly a forward step in technology AND in saving the environment, I believe that the forward step should include being able to do what their predecessors did, namely, provide light to a room when switched on.

After a few months these Utilitech bulbs are no longer living up to the “instant on” hype. It seems that as each day passes the bulbs give off less and less light when first turned on. They take longer to warm up to their proper temperature.

It’s a small wonder that these guys are projected to last twice as long as their predecessors. They’re not doing anything!

Now, I’m all for saving the environment. I believe that we should leave the world in better shape than when we found it, but the poor performance of these Utilitech bulbs, coupled with the fact that they have to be handled like a hazardous material when disposing them due to the amount of mercury they contain, makes me wonder why we have this insane push to get everyone to buy these bulbs.

I don’t think our relatively new bulbs are going to make it through the end of the year. And I’m definitely not going to replace them with CFLs again. I think we are going to end up switching over to LED lightbulbs. This is not the optimal solution, after all, LED bulbs are fairly expensive, but they light up instantly when required to do so and then even work on dimmer switches.

On the other hand, I could go crazy and just stock up on incandescents while I still have the chance.

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Missed.

So I’ve been reading and hearing about Pet Shop Boys’ latest concert tour and from what I can ascertain, it is amazing as always. I have never seen Pet Shops Boys in concert before and perhaps if they ever tour again I’ll take the opportunity to see what they’re all about.

The reason that I haven’t gone out and seen them on tour is because, well, I’m not really that big of a fan of Pet Shop Boys. I like some of their songs, but I guess my favorite Pet Shop Boys-esque songs would have to be when Neil Tennant sang with the group Electronic. “Disappointed” is one of my favorite dance tracks from the 90s.

I’m also a fan of Electronic’s “Getting Away With It”. Neil sings backups on that one.

I think one of the reasons I wasn’t a Pet Shop Boys fan back in the day was because I didn’t “get” them. Musically I have always found them to be quite good but they never really looked particularly happy on their album covers. This was always disconcerting to me. If you’re going to sing somewhat happy sounding pop music, you should look mildly happy or at least somewhat engaged on your album cover. At least, that was the logic I was processing in my at the time 16-year-old mind.

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Like I said, I didn’t “get” them.

As I DJ I didn’t really spin their music that much. They were never really in my “OMG I have to play this record!” category when I had the ability to pack the dance floor by playing the proper music on Technics SL-1200 turntables, but I would play one of their tracks once in a while. Anyone that worked at Wow-FM back when I was program director can probably attest that there wasn’t a lot of Pet Shop Boys in rotation on the dance-oriented station. I guess that wasn’t a fair decision for me to make but we didn’t get a lot of requests to support otherwise, I guess.

There is one track of there’s that I have always enjoyed. It came out in 1987 and peaked at on the Billboard Top 40. Now this track I like, musically, lyrically and throughout its video presentation.

Here’s “What Have I Done To Deserve This?” by Pet Shop Boys with Dusty Springfield.

Glorious.

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I should never weigh myself in the morning. But if you don’t weigh yourself in the morning, after your shower but before breakfast, how are you going to score the lowest number possible in the day? That’s my philosophy.

I have been trying to lose just a few more pounds to hit the goal I set for myself a year ago. Just a few more pounds. But I’ve been at the same weight now for a couple of weeks. I eat a little. I exercise a lot. I eat a lot. I exercise a little. It doesn’t make a difference. My body is apparently comfortable at this weight and I should just be happy with the number I spin up on the scale. It’s better than spitting up on the scale, I suppose.

But then again, it’s just a number, right? Why do I let these things affect my life? I’m not dropping dead. I can ride my bike 100 miles if I want to. There’s not a lot of people my age in the United States that can ride their bike 100 miles in a day. Most probably don’t want to. Why do I worry about these things?

So a few moments ago I decided that I was going to stop worrying about my weight. I will continue to remain vigilant and I will certainly hope to reach that goal I set for myself a year ago (I guess 30 out of 35 pounds isn’t really that bad) but I’m going to stop stressing about it. Why stress?

To celebrate, I went out on our front porch and decided to just enjoy the moment. I embraced the sunshine on my face and then whisper of the gentle breeze and the warmth of the day. Life is way too short to stress about stuff. And I need to remember that more often.

I’m not going to sweat the small stuff. Heck, I’m not even going to sweat the big stuff. I just going to enjoy the moment.

And this moment is glorious.

Wawa.

So last night I updated my Facebook status with a blurb about Earl and I yelling and screaming and Earl telling me to go get something at Wawa, which is 275 miles away from our house.

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The Facebook status was meant to be humorous, but judging by the number of folks that have reached out to me today to see if I was alright, I thought I should probably set the record straight:

1. Wawa is a convenience store chain in eastern Pennsylvania. Apparently, kind of like the great “soda” vs “pop” debate in Upstate New York, Pennsylvania folks are split between Wawa in eastern Pa and Sheetz in western Pa. The reason Earl told me to go to Wawa is because as a lower Bucks County, Pa. native, when we are arguing he can slip into his near-Philly accent, and Wawa is part of that vernacular. In reality, he meant he wanted me to go the Fastrac that’s a mile from the house (for some sort of treat like a KitKat or something) but Wawa just came out of his mouth. It’s like the occasional glass of wooder we enjoy from the tap.

2. Earl and I have been together for over 17 years and while we have had our share of disagreements, it is rare that we fight. Now, Cub has probably seen most of our fights as we have tended to get more set in our ways as we get older (I’ve threatened him with shoving his wheelchair somewhere when he’s that old), but like any married couple we can get cantankerous as we are having a discussion. It probably doesn’t help when I tell him not to be “so AARP about it” or “stop acting like you’re 50s old”, but that’s what he gets for marrying a youthful lad such as myself. Cub just shakes his head at the whole thing. Anyways, any real fight we have had has been executed in silence, I yell and he tells me not to when we’re having a disagreement.

3. Last night I went to upgrade Earl’s iPhone 4S to iOS 7 (like the dutiful Apple soldier that I am) and partway through the process, the ghost of Mr. Jobs informed me that Earl didn’t have enough space on his phone. It turns out he had NO space on his phone. In the process of deleting photos and music that had been backed up this iCloud, while foolishly making sure nothing was lost by plugging his iPhone in so it could sync with iTunes, I confused the ghost of Mr. Jobs and his iPhone 4S didn’t know what to do. So it had some sort of hissy fit and decided to show its Apple logo and nothing else. I ended up having to wipe out his phone completely and reloading it, but only after following some poorly produced video on YouTube that was suppose to help me do everything aside from wipe my butt properly. The video told me to hold in the volume up button until the logo went away. 10 minutes later and after sizable dent was permanently installed in my finger, no dice. This created panic mode. Sometimes I think it’d be easier to defuse a bomb in Afghanistan instead of working on someone’s iPhone when they think they’re losing something, because folks just lose it. I’ll jump on the bomb in the future.

4. Lastly, while waiting for Earl’s refreshed phone to return to normalcy, I suggested that he might want to clean up some of the photos and music on his phone. He pointed out that his iCloud account had plenty of space and why didn’t I just use some of that. Technobabble flew out of my mouth in typical geek fashion for a few seconds but then I stopped, counted to 10 and started talking about apples and oranges. That’s when the pitch of my voice went up a bit and the volume went up a little bit and then I reminded him that he exceeds me in IQ, SAT scores, age and weight and that he should know this. (I beat him on the ACT, apparently). That’s when the Wawa comment came out and we both laughed when I said, “Wawa? I hate Wawa and the closest one is in the Poconos!”

We had a nice laugh together and decided that we’ll drive to the Poconos so we can go to Wawa this weekend.

After I update his phone.

Geek Time.

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For the past 24 hours or so my iPhone and iPad have been going crazy with app updates. I probably have around 50 apps on my iPhone and 100 apps on my iPad and I would say that half of them have been updated in preparation for the big release of iOS 7. For those not familiar with iJargon, iOS 7 is the latest iteration of the operating system used on the iPhone, iPad, iPod and Apple TV. iOS 7 brings a paradigm shift in look and feel of the OS and also brings along a whole bunch of new, nifty features.

Android fanboys will tell you that Apple is catching up with Android. Apple fanboys will tell you that Android is just a copy of iOS. People will snarl, people will yell and I will close the window that contains the conversation because as the outdated saying goes, “Ain’t nobody got time for that.”

One of the features of iOS 7 is AirDrop, which allows you to select something on your iPhone or iPad and magically, breathlessly beam it to another person with an iDevice. You can confine AirDrop to folks on your contact list or you can make AirDrop be wide open so anyone can beam a file (a picture or a document or whatever) over to your phone.

The possibilities are endless!

I kind of like the idea of AirDrop, in fact, I used it to beam the photo of my iPad that you see above. Long, long ago I used a similar feature on one of my Palm devices to send my phone number over to another passenger on the T in Boston. I was single at the time but he never called. At least I hope I was single at the time. Hmm.

Oh the way I kid. Earl and I shall laugh about this little bit of kidding this evening over supper. We’ll have a nice laugh together.

I mentioned on my Facebook stream yesterday that folks should go ahead and update to iOS 7 when given the opportunity. Though I have an iPhone 5 and an iPad 4, I’ve heard good things about the new operating system on older devices, though if you have an iPhone 3GS or an original iPad, you’re out of luck.

Now, I’m going to confess right here and now that I have been toying with the idea of switching to an Android device, more specifically, a Moto X. I’ve read great things about it. I’ve heard great things about it. But I’ve touched it and while it is quite nice, it’s still not as solid feeling as the iPhone 5 that I currently have. I’ve become accustomed to technological perfection through Apple’s attention to detail and while Apple does stumble from time to time, you can’t deny the polish that their iDevices have. I like solid. I must have solid. I hear the new iPhone 5c, in its polycarbonate shell, has a metal frame which will help maintain that solid feeling that so many of us Macboys enjoy.

So I’m still on the fence about moving to the Moto X and if I continue to feel the way I feel today, I probably won’t do anything of the sort because my iPhone and iPad are behaving wonderfully with the new iOS that comes out shortly for the masses.

Awwwwwwww geek out! Le geek, c’est chic!

AM.

So I just got back from a ride in the Jeep. When I was a baby, my Mom and Dad would drive me around in their Volkswagen Beetle in an effort to make me fall asleep. I guess I wasn’t the best of sleepers when I was a wee lad. I wonder if I crawled in my sleep. Hmmm.

It’s a beautifully clear night here in Central New York. Like earlier today, the air is crisp. As I turned on the radio and realized that Sirius/XM is playing the exact same songs in the order that they played them in six hours ago, I started punching buttons on my stereo and landed on the AM band.

Remember the AM band?

As I slowly spun the dial, carefully landing on each available frequency to see if there was anything other than static available to the listener, I instantly noticed that there’s not a lot of music available on the AM dial. This is OK, because music on the radio these days is mostly crap, in my opinion, unless it’s something nostalgic.

Making my way down the dial brought back memories of sitting in my bedroom at age 14 looking for Dr. Ruth on a Sunday night. Even back then I was a huge geek and I would opt to listen to Dr. Ruth on Rock 102 out of Buffalo instead of listening to her on the much closer Y94. I have always found it so cool that at night (and during thunderstorms) you can tune in some distant stations on a good radio. This works on both the FM and the AM band.

During my ride a few moments ago I listened to WBAL out of Baltimore. I also tuned in a station that never mentioned its call letters but it talked about Sudbury and North Bay. Since I know a radio engineer in that part of the woods, I’m not surprised that his transmitters might be cranking out the amount of power required to reach my ears. It’s a cool way to connect.

The AM radio band is pretty much forgotten in today’s digital age. Spinning the dial around the three and four digit frequencies relaxed me enough to know that I’m going to get a good night’s sleep.

Sometimes it’s good to be nostalgic.

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