I’m lucky to work for a corporation that embraces diversity. Our company has an active LGBT+ ERG, or Employee Resource Group. It’s great to have this representation and it reminds me of when I worked for Digital (DEC) back in the late ’80s and early ’90s. Back then we had a couple of similar organizations and it helped make me feel comfortable with my sexuality back in the day.

As part of Pride month, there have been some articles and videos on the company website about the topic, particularly from allies of the gay community. Like some mainstream news outlets, various literature from the LGBT+ groups across the country, and the language of the younger ones, these folks have embraced the word “queer”. I often hear the likes of “we are reclaiming this word!” and people running around calling themselves queer.

I still very much cringe when I hear that word. As a gay man in my mid 50s, I’ve heard that word from too many people and when that word was used it wasn’t used in a festive, celebratory context. Occasionally it was punctuated with a continued verbal assault and once in a great while a physical interaction.

I know the younger ones like to run around doing their own thing, expressing themselves freely and openly and I think that’s great. Good for them. Everyone has the right to be themselves as long as it’s not hurting other people. And personally, for me, the word “queer” has a lot of sting and psychologically still packs a punch. I will not embrace the word. I tried a few years ago but it just didn’t fit. I won’t use the word in a jolly context. I’m not discouraging others from doing the same, again, you be you, but don’t expect me to run around like Rip Taylor, shooting off sparkler cannons and throwing my toupee around screaming about being happily queer. Because I’m not.

I’m happy as a gay man.

Years ago my Twitter profile stated, “More guy than gay” and I caught quite a bit of cruft from the gay “community” around that statement. Today my social media profiles usually say something like “Just a guy with a husband” because that’s how I see myself. I’m just a guy with a husband. To me being gay is just a part of who I am, “part” being the keyword. Loyal, honest, loving, caring, determined, funny, patient, portly, nuts and eccentric are also all words that could probably be used to describe me, but that would make for an out-of-control alphabet soup of character traits and I don’t enjoy all those letters either.

I joke this makes me a bad gay man in the 21st century.

Perhaps I should be compared to the Chevrolet Impala that came out the same year I was born: big, available in manual or automatic, and complete with a choice of sedan, sport coupe, or fastback.


I am mentally exhausted tonight. I am in bed early. For our mutual enjoyment, here’s a picture of Roger C Carmel in bed. Because he’s hot and had an enjoyable mustache. 

More Than A Quarter of a Century.

It’s official. My husband and I have been married for more than a quarter of a century. Today we are celebrating 26 years of wedded bliss and honestly, I don’t know where the time has gone.

We are going out to dinner this evening at a nice place called Commoner and Co. here in Tucson. We may go shopping beforehand.

As long as we’re together, I’m good.

Extra. Extra.

I’ve mentioned before that I enjoy watching extras employed in a movie or television series. Some of them overact, some of them underact, and some are just a delight to look at.

I spotted this extra in a scene in “The Devil Wears Prada” years ago (I’ve always been a fan of the Miranda Priestly character). I actually think I spotted him in a deleted scene that I saw on YouTube or something. I don’t know anything about him and his name isn’t listed in the credits in IMDB, but he is a delight to look at.

Real Ads.

I think Instagram has finally figured me out with their ad algorithm.

Man Size Love.

I’ve posted this video before, but this song has been hanging out in my brain for a few days.

This track was released the week I graduated from high school, and I remember cranking it up on the radio in my 1978 Plymouth Sapporo while I was driving alone along the shores of Lake Ontario. At the time it was a song that I wouldn’t really sing along with in public, as a few years earlier I found myself singing in the hallways at school, “because we are living in a material world…” and before I could finish, an older student named John asked if I was a material girl. I stopped singing pop songs between classes for a little while because of that.

From 1986, here’s Klymaxx with “Man Size Love”.


Who knew Endora’s spell to make Darrin extremely vain would turn him into such a queen? This episode of “Bewitched” has always been one of my favorite of the series. From season five, it’s episode #146 “Mirror, Mirror On The Wall”.

Pure Pop.

For some reason this track crossed my mind today and it’s been my ear worm for much of this Friday. Enjoy this song from 2006. It’s Jessica Simpson with “A Public Affair”.

The video is cute. It’s hard to believe this song is 15 years old.

Dancing In The Moonlight.

I miss “Xena”. Any feeble attempt at a reboot would be just that, feeble. Xena knew how to kick ass and she knew how to have fun.