Eh Pad.

There’s a running joke in our family that my name is Cole Slaw. Usually, when folks of the gay community are looking through photos or approaching us out in public, they’re all about the rest of the family and their beards and beefy appearances and the what not. Occasionally I get a “and who’s this?” with a finger waggled in my direction. I tell the waggler that I’m the cole slaw and that I’m included with the main dish whether you like it or not.

I watched Apple’s event (after the fact) when they announced “their best iPad lineup yet”. I long for the day when Apple decides to take a left turn and NOT announce their best iPad lineup yet but instead just say, “here’s a bunch of iPads we thought of” just so everyone in the tech press can clutch their pearls, gasp, and then go on and on about how Apple is failing again.

So there’s new iPad Airs and iPad Pros that have all sorts of spec bumps and size bumps and new accessories and more importantly, thickness reductions that will allow you to bend the iPad like the Six Million Dollar Man or The Bionic Woman (depending on how you identify).

And while I’m talking about bending iPads, what was with the commercial at the beginning of the Apple Event where they crushed everything like so much garbage in a landfill, complete with something’s eyes bulging out as it gasped for its last breath. I mean, they were crushing guitars and televisions and all sorts of things and, perhaps it’s because of my brain chemistry, but I found the intro to be really off-putting and so unlike Apple.

Anywho, we have the new iPad Air and the new iPad Pro lineup. I was really hoping for something, anything, to be upgraded on the iPad Mini, but Tim barely mentioned its existence like so much cole slaw next to the main dish.

I can relate. And it looks like I’ll continue to use my rapidly aging iPad Mini for flying until something, anything happens to that particular model.