Television.

When I was younger I would get excited about this time of the year because of the impending arrival of a double edition of TV Guide. This particular edition of TV Guide was not just a listing of what was scheduled to be on the tube for that week with a few random articles interspersed here and there, no, this double edition featured a full listing and description of all the new television shows planned for the new fall season that would begin in mid September. These exciting listings would include full color photos of the cast of the new show. I would feel much excitement about these new shows and pick out the ones that I would want to watch, assuring that they wouldn’t have a conflict with the other shows I enjoyed.

I guess I was easy to please.

There are several shows that I remember being excited about as a kid. Here are a couple that I remember being excited about but they didn’t last for very long:

1. “Mr. Merlin”. I remember this show with Clark Brandon as the apprentice of Merlin the Wizard. I think Elaine Joyce might have been in it too. I remembered Clark from one of the last episodes of “Wonder Woman”. I found him obnoxious only because he got to do the cool television stuff with cool people. It was pure jealousy.

2. “The Powers of Matthew Star”. Another supernatural show with a lead character that I found obnoxious only as fueled by my jealousy.

3. “We Got It Made”. This one wasn’t supernatural, but it was worth remembering because the apartment on the show had the same painting of a boat that my grandparents had hanging over their television. Teri Copley as the gorgeous maid did nothing for me, but the smart guy, Matt McCoy certain did. He fit into my mid teen fantasies quiet nicely.

Looking back on these shows they seem quite ridiculous, but then when I compare those shows to what I’ve recently seen on today’s television, they seem like works of art. Earl and I ended up watching some piece of drek on TruTV the other night that had something to do with repossessed cars. I think the only plot of the show was to piss off the female guard, who was a big woman that seemed to growl and beat on people. I’m a little embarrassed by the fact that I watched it long enough to figure out what was going on but I’m really embarrassed by the fact that this is what passes for entertainment on American television now. I found reality shows mildly entertaining in the early 00s, now I can’t stand to watch them. I can feel my IQ drifting downwards every time I see someone do something stupid in glorious 46″ HDTV.

There’s a part of me that would really like to cut the cord to DirecTV and just rely on downloaded shows. We have all the pieces and parts necessary to do it. I have the entire second season of “Happy Endings” ready to go at a moment’s notice, but there’s two issues with this approach: 1. We can’t watch live football off the internet and 2. Earl likes to click the clicker and find something to watch.

I have been passing time watching old episodes of “Maude”, “Eight Is Enough” and “The Little House on the Prairie”. I’m finding much more entertainment by downloading these shows instead of watching what’s being thrown all over the airwaves and cable today.

I can’t think of one show that I’m excited about with the arrival of the new season in September. I don’t know what’s new or what’s coming back. I’ve heard about “American Idol” but I gave up on that seasons ago. I lost interest in “Private Practice” when Shonda Rhimes decided to exploit gay men in the military through a ridiculously timed episode about a man being raped by his commanding officer (stereotypes get ratings!) “Modern Family” has become hugely predictable and quite frankly I don’t know what else is on. I had heard something about a revival of “Bewitched” but I don’t think it’s going to happen. GOOD! Oh, I heard about a revival of “The Munsters” but I don’t know what’s going on with that.

I’m not motivated enough about it to care.