J.P.

Coasting.

‘Stache On-‘Stache Off Update: ‘Stache On is ahead right now with some nice contributions to the Ali Forney Center. If you wish to contribute, please see this blog post and/or click ‘Stache On to vote for me to keep my mustache or ‘Stache Off for me to shave it off.
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So as I write this, I have been on a conference call for work for 5 1/2 hours. We are waiting for people in Ft. Wayne, Indiana to get where they need to be so we can figure out why the light is going up the glass tubes otherwise known as fiber optics. Surprisingly, I’m not cranky about this.

The reason I’m not cranky is because I am on-call this weekend and I have just accepted the fact that it’s going to be a weekend of uncertainty and not knowing what I’m doing. I have very little in the way of plans. I kind of like this idea of coasting through a couple of days. Even though I’m on call, I’m hoping that I will find time to relax. I just want to chill.

I’m still feeling the effects of my cold but I’m did much better today. It seems like it was one of the 24 hour bugs. The one dose of cold medicine did the trick, apparently, because I haven’t taken anything further. Perhaps that’s why I’m so mellow.

Cold Medicine.

‘Stache On-‘Stache Off Update: ‘Stache On is ahead right now with some nice contributions to the Ali Forney Center. If you wish to contribute, please see this blog post and/or click ‘Stache On to vote for me to keep my mustache or ‘Stache Off for me to shave it off.
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So when I arrived at work this morning I immediately started sneezing. I wasn’t completely surprised by this because the building I work at a few days a week always makes me sneeze; it has that “70’s Sealed In Charm” that is so prevalent in office buildings these days. The problem is, the sneezing wasn’t the only event, my nose started running and I became rather sweaty.

I tried really hard to tough it out through the day, but shortly after 3:00 p.m. I asked my boss if I could leave at 4:00 p.m. so I could go home and try to sleep it through so I’d be ready for a fresh start on Friday. He approved my departure and I headed home.

When I got home I downed two cold medicine tablets. I hate taking medicine and I don’t really believe in it, but since my symptoms had gotten to the point where they were making me beyond miserable, I decided I had had enough and that I would just sleep through the weird side effects that these types of pills give me.

I get really weird on these things. Sometimes I get mean, sometimes I get loopy and at other times I just hallucinate my way through a drug-induced haze and then in 24 hours all is well and I am back on track. When I got home I immediately crashed and slept a few hours before Earl woke me up to let me know that supper was ready. Just after his waking me up, I started thinking about work as I got my wits together. This is where the loopy comes in.

I decided that it would be perfectly acceptable if the software I’m writing used graphics to denote approved or rejected requests that it processes. In my head I figured out what I would need to do to implement this:

1. To approve the request, drag the row to the image of Glinda the Good Witch.
2. To deny the request, drag it to the Wicked Witch.
3. To edit the request, drag it to Toto, who will then open up a paper icon with his paws.

Yep, these are the thoughts that were going through my head upon waking and a problem that I was trying to solve logistically.

Can you imagine the looks on the users’ face if I had gone through with it? Maybe it would have spiced up their day with a little bit of an over the rainbow experience. Perhaps everyone needs that sort of inspiration.

‘Stache On-‘Stache Off

So it’s been a very hot summer thus far. This big mustache of mine has been creeping in my mouth, sticking out all over the place yet garnering a few stares in everyday life (which I enjoy). As I looked at myself in the mirror this morning, I contemplated trimming it back or shaving it off completely. It’s been a while since I’ve changed up my look a little bit.

With trimmers in my hand, something in the back of my head told me that I had to do something special. After all, this mustache has been described as “epic”. “It’s huge!” “It looks like he has a small country sitting under his nose!”

I couldn’t bring the trimmers to my face. If it’s going to go, it’s going to go in style.

So I have decided to keep the mustache for the next three weeks and let the masses decide it’s fate. If this “epic” mustache is going to go, it’s going to go in an epic way.

So here’s the deal. I have started the “‘Stache On-‘Stache Off” campaign to raise money for the Ali Forney Center, which provides housing for Homeless LGBT Youth. I’m lucky, I have a loving family and have had the support of my relatives for as long as I can remember. Others are not so lucky and find themselves on the street with nowhere to go. This happens way too often and if there’s something I can do to help, even if it’s this little thing with this mustache I have, I’m going to do it.

So, this is what I need you to do. If you want the mustache to stay, donate to this campaign:
‘STACHE ON-‘Stache Off.

If you want the mustache to GO, donate to this campaign:
‘Stache On-‘STACHE OFF.

The bucket with the most amount of money at 2359 ET on 24 Aug 12 will determine the fate of this mustache. If it stays, it hangs around through the end of the year. If it goes, though I hate being clean shaven, I will shave it off completely and then probably grow a little mustache of more reasonable proportion after a few weeks. And of course, all proceeds go to the Ali Forney Center.

Please help me help those that need a safe, secure way to find their path in life.

Thank you.

Priorities.

So there’s a third season episode of “The New Adventures of Wonder Woman” called “Time Bomb”. In this episode, guest stars Ted Shackelford and Joan Van Ark play time traveling scientists from 2155; Joan wants to cash in on the capitalistic opportunities of late 1970s America and Ted is the inventor of time travel and needs to stop her. Of course, Lynda Carter’s Wonder Woman does most of the stopping and there’s a bit of an attraction between Wonder Woman and Ted’s character. It always happens.

Aside from the fact that computers are apparently going to be very noisy in 2155 and decorating schemes are obviously going to go all to hell (see photo above), I bring up this episode because there’s an interesting bit of dialog that I have always kind of agreed with. Joan’s character is relaying how technological advances are slowed down because “The Council” (whatever happened to a Presidential figure in the future?) has deemed that no technology would be introduced to society if it was determined that it would have a significant impact to social norms. Once the cultural and societal ramifications were studied and determined, then new technology would be released to the masses.

I think that’s a groovy thing. I wish Joan and Ted were around when cell phones were being invented.

I just stood in line at the local Subway in an effort to order my lunch. In front of me was a young lady. I know that kind of wording makes me sound old, but she had to be only 16 or 17 years old. She was dressed seductively with shorts similar in cut to Wonder Woman’s 1970 costume shorts (less stars = more ass). Up to her ear was a smartphone. It looked like it was a Blackberry, appeared to be well worn and was decked right out in all sorts of bedazzlement.

The folks at the area Subways have put up signs that say “Please don’t talk on the cell phone while you’re ordering.” It’s politely worded. The font is friendly. There is no suggestion of reprimand, just a reminder of what folks should find to be standard manners.

Apparently the young lady can not read and does not comprehend standard manners.

As she giggled and carried on on her bedazzled Blackberry, she barked out things like “a foot long turkey!”. When the Subway assembly man asked her as to the type of cheese she would like, she clicked her tongue on the phone, said “hold on” and gave a stare at said Assembly Man before saying “American”. Luckily, she was able to indicate that she wanted her sub toasted before resuming her important giggling on the phone.

When it came to vegetable assembly, she continued barking out random items from a garden while talking on the phone before bringing the whole process to a halt and declaring, “oh! I want avocado!” Now if she had been paying attention to the matters at hand instead of talking to the remote, tinny, giggling sounds coming from her bedazzlement of wonder, this would not have messed up the assembly line, where subs were then rearranged, backtracked and reassembled.

All because she couldn’t put her phone down.

While I was observing all this merriment, I felt my phone vibrate it’s “text message!” pattern in my pocket. I did not bringing everything to a screeching halt to read said message, I waited until I had paid my money, assembled my large, unsweetened iced tea and sat down in the Jeep before proceeding.

Little Miss Short Shorts was still talking on her phone as she tried to carry her sub and drink on a tray. She almost ran down a woman in a walker but by god she was able to continue on her conversation.

Joan and Ted need to travel here from 2155, pronto, and show the world how much better it can be if we at least consider the societal impacts of technology before implementing it. Until that time, I fear that it’s only going to get worse.

I’m writing this to remind myself of this woman’s behavior, because I freely admit that there are times that I have had messed up priorities when it comes to using my phone.. As I try to better myself each day, a reminder of why I try to better myself is always a good thing.

Spiritual.

I think I had a spiritual moment whilst standing on the Golden Gate Bridge this past week. It was a glowing happiness that washed over me as I stood there, enjoying the sun and the breezes and the water below. Perhaps it was relatives that have passed on stopping by to enjoy the view with me. Maybe it was the gentle smile from the clergy-like attired man that was there to speak with those that thought about having their last spiritual moment on the bridge. Whatever it was, I felt calm, at peace, recharged and ready to take on the future head-on after a few moments of standing there.

When I returned to the observation area, the man that knows me better than any other person on this world sensed that “something” had happened on the bridge for me. I couldn’t put it in words for him so I didn’t try. I know I felt more relaxed than I have in a couple of years. The feeling carries on.

This weekend a friend asked if I am a spiritual person. The emphasis of the question was on the word ‘spiritual’ versus ‘religious’. I’m definitely not a religious person; I think the vast majority of organized religions have taken the a beautiful intent and perverted into a diatribe of hate, a conversation of a fear and an intent of pure profit. But spirituality is something completely different for me. Spirituality is found when the heart connects with everything that surrounds it. I seek beauty everywhere I look. I fully believe that this life, right now, is just one chapter of a multi-faceted journey and I fully believe that we have kindred spirits that we have known before, we know now and we will know again. I have met people where there was just a resounding ‘click’. When I meet someone for the first time and I feel that ‘click’, I attribute it to some sort of connection and start talking with them like I’ve known them before. I figure we had a conversation in a previous life or something, so we might as well just continue on together. I know, it sounds very Shirley MacLaine. I’m okay with that (though I wasn’t completely okay with her portrayal of Endora).

I know a lot of gay men that are atheists. I know many that have found a path similar to mine; finding spirituality via the Universe instead of relying on the writings of man. Each of us have our own path and I’m fine with that. I’m not going to try to change your mind and I thank you for not trying to change mine. We have our beliefs and I don’t think that it all comes down a binary answer.

I believe that we can do wondrous things for the world if we just open our hearts and minds. Standing on the Golden Gate Bridge opened up my heart and mind a little more. My goal is to maintain that openness and do what I can to make the world a better place. So yes, I am a very spiritual person and I am happy that I have found that again.

UA 54.

So Earl, Jamie and I are sitting on UA 54 on our way home from San Francisco. I just waved out the window at our friends Tim and Gordon in Cheyenne, Wyo. It helps to be a road/map geek. I can sometimes spot a city from the air. The map on the monitor in front of me helps a bit.

According to the rotating display in front of me, the air temperature is currently -57ºF. For some reason this doesn’t seem right to me. That’s damn cold. But, I’ve never been outside of an aircraft at this altitude so perhaps it is that chilly.

I have been watching the passengers mill about the cabin for the distancia recorrida of 1585 Km. There is one particular woman who became cranky when the flight attendant wanted to get around her as she just stood in the aisle. The cranky woman wasn’t going anywhere in particular, she was just standing there. Perhaps she was looking for an ATM or a bus or something. She didn’t head to the wash room and she didn’t look to concerned about being seated, she just kind of hung out and looked crabby. I took a picture of the back of her head and posted it on Instagram (actually, it will post to Instagram when we have wifi again) because I think it’s rude to post a person’s face unless they’re hot and she’s not hot.

For a while I watched another United plane fly alongside us, about four miles off our wing and probably 2000 feet lower in altitude. It then veered under us and headed off somewhere else.

We are flying on a Boeing 757. While our flight to San Francisco had DirecTV available, this plane does not. We have touch screens that have movies on demand. I’m declining the offer, opting to listen to music and answer emails and write blog entries instead. Jamie is napping and Earl is watching a movie. I don’t know what he is watching. Since we have our own “family row” on this trip, I’ve spread out a little bit and am enjoying typing on the keyboard I brought along for the trip. It’s much easier than trying to type on an iPad keyboard.

San Francisco was absolutely lovely. We made new friends, met a few that were online only friends but unfortunately we did not have the opportunity to meet everyone we wanted to meet. I think we need a couple more weeks in San Francisco to meet everyone we wanted to touch base with. We’ll have to go back soon.

Cranky ugly sat down with a haughty huff. It was hard to discern the haughtiness through the puckered facial expressions, but when you’re a people watcher, you get better at these things. I hope she’s more pleasant at home. It would suck to go through life in a constant cranky state.

San Francisco: Day 2.

I’m starting to fall victim to that growing trend of microblogging instead of just writing things down in my blog like I have normally done in the past. When I then start to write the intended blog entry, I start thinking that what I’m writing is repetitive and that it might offend anyone that may have read the contents of said blog entry in a different context via a different channel (Google+, Twitter or Facebook) but then I decide that I don’t care. Here is where I am my most expressive.

I’m complicated like that.

Anyways, yesterday was touring day. Our first stop was the Union Square Shopping District because I lost my mind Wednesday morning and packed only a few t-shirts and nothing with longer sleeves. I was relieved to find that I had remembered jeans and underwear and socks, so I had at least some of my wits about me. While at Union Square we went to places like Macy’s, the Apple Store and the Art of Shaving, where I made a purchase, didn’t make a purchase and made a purchase, in that order. We did take the obligatory photograph at the Apple store, using a 13-inch MacBook Air.


After Union Square we made a pass through the Golden Gate Park Area and then headed over to the Golden Gate Bridge. The visitor’s center on the San Francisco side of the bridge was a madhouse, so we crossed the bridge a parked in the lookout area on that side. Earl and Jamie busied themselves a bit while I went for a walk across the bridge.


View from the lookout area.


Starting the walk across.


There were a number of signs letting folks that might be feeling despondent know that life was worth living and that jumping from the bridge would be a fatal and tragic event, for themselves and for others. I’ve seen these types of signs before but I think this is the first time I’ve seen two clergy-type people stationed on a bridge. At least they looked clergy-like with flowing robes and an important book in their hand. They appeared to be pleasant.

After I returned from my walk across the bridge and back, we drove up to one of the higher lookout points to take a couple of photos.


We then crossed back into San Francisco and enjoyed a little down time before heading to Fisherman’s Wharf for supper. We were going to take a Cable Car, but all hell broke loose when a large tourist group came by and took up the whole Cable Car, so we decided to take a taxi. It was cheaper and less stressful.

We ate at No. 9 Fisherman’s Grotto where we had a pleasant view.


Earl looks sophisticated while perusing the menu.


Cub makes his choices quickly and then uses his iPhone.

I’m not a huge lover of seafood but I found my supper to be tasty. I don’t know what I ate but there was a butter sauce involved.

After dinner we walked around Fisherman’s Wharf for a while and tried to not be like the other tourists that were milling about. I guess we’re snobby like that. After a bit we hopped a cap back to our hotel where we relaxed and then decided to call us a night. This Pacific Time Zone thing is kind of hard.

So far I really like San Francisco, though I don’t really find it to be a place that I would want to live, though I know I would enjoy visiting it on a regular basis. I guess I’m a country boy at heart and find it a little crowded. I love the vibe of the city though.

A Married Conversation.

Him: “Turn right on Folsom.”
Me: “I can’t turn right on Folsom. It’s a one way the other way.”
Him: “Take the next right and go around.”

I do as he suggests. Ten minutes later we’ve crossed a very large bridge, apparently the start of Interstate 80, and have completely left the city of San Francisco. I expect to be in Wyoming soon.

Me: “Where are we?”
Him: “I don’t know.”

I take the next exit. It’s labeled in a traditional CalTrans manner with a dark green sign and reflective letters. The sign was installed in 1955. There was a mention of a marina. I pull over to the side of the road.

I grab my iPhone and jump into the maps app. I plunk at the keyboard and enter the address of the hotel we’re staying at. We’re 15 miles away. All I wanted to do was turn right on Folsom.

Me: “Please read me this list of directions so we can get back to where we are staying.”
Him: “Do a U Turn and get on the road that goes to the 580”

The sign says “No U Turn” but I say fuck it and do it anyways.

The sign says “I-80 West San Francisco”. Below it, a suggestion of something about 580 and maybe Stockton but there’s a big chunk of sign missing, perhaps where they should be an arrow or something. I think 580 is in the other direction.

Him: “Turn left!”

I zoom up the ramp and notice that it comes to a merge point where there is heavy traffic merging. I do the reasonable thing and yield to the traffic on the freeway. All of a sudden there’s horns blaring from cars behind me and cars on the freeway. Apparently in California I’m just suppose to cut out in front of everyone and say “fuck it”. So I do.

Him: “Get off at Exit 1B. It’s like the Exit 354A we got off earlier!”
Me: “I don’t know what that means!”
Him: “Take Mission Street!”

The exclamation points are intentional.

I get to Mission Street exit, which is labeled Exit 354A.

Him: “I don’t know the rest of the way. Something happened to the app and the directions are gone.”

He has apparently switched to Yelp, which located a McDonalds.

Me: “Double click and hit maps!”
Me: “Hit Resume!! Hit it!”

Jamie flings himself over the seat and makes shaking motions with my phone.

“Turn left on VanNess.”

Back on track.

And that’s how married people drive through San Francisco.

UA71

So I am sitting on United flight 71, en route from Newark to San Francisco. We paid the extra fee to sit in a exit row, because one should always do their part in keeping fellow human beings safe and there’s extra leg room in this row. Of course, we can’t recline the seat in this row, as we are on a 737 and there’s an exit row behind us and our reclined seats would block the exit row behind us in the event of an emergency. And if such a thing happened, we wouldn’t be doing a very good job at keeping our fellow passengers safe by blocking the exit row with our reclined seat. So we sit upright but can stretch forward. There is a very nice woman sitting to my right.

The flight has been smooth thus far. I bought noise canceling headphones for the trip. I have watched one episode of “The Bionic Woman” (the real one, not the horrible reimagining) and I watched the pilot episode of “Charmed”, but that was the second version of the pilot with Alyssa Milano as Phoebe, not Lori Rom.

Earl is playing Bejeweled. A quick glance out the window indicates we are somewhere over the Midwest, judging by the grid like patterned the roads. The clouds are fluffy and somewhat sparse.

Jamie is meeting us in San Francisco tonight; he’s been doing tour stuff in Southern California and will be on a bus longer than we’ve been on a plane today. Scott is flying in as well. He lands later tonight.

The flight attendant on our flight from Syracuse to Newark was very nice. Her name was Angie and I called her by name, but only when I said goodbye. I’m not overly needy like tourist types. The flight attendants on this flight seem pleasant as well. The only one that has mentioned his name is John. He’s a scruffy cub type that wears white Sally Jesse-Rafael glasses. He is not unpleasant. The other FAs are keeping busy by making flapping motions at the coach passengers that keep trying to use the first class rest room. Perhaps they need to close the limp blue curtain the separates the 1% from the other 99%. I told Earl that I’d like to try first class just once in my life. I can fake a haughty, entitled air about myself if I so desire.

Earl and I opted to eat food on the flight. I had a Thai chicken wrap and Earl had Asian noodles. Both were good and I haven’t had to have a flight attendant make flapping motions at me, so I guess it agreed with my system just fine.

I was stunned to find our flights relatively on time. I didn’t think that happened much these days. Our flight from Syracuse was late for departure but we took the less scenic route, apparently, and landed right on time. I was a little concerned that we would have a maintenance delay due to a black puddle of stuff that had dripped out of the right side engine of the plane but apparently it wasn’t important. The co-pilot touched it and smelled it but he didn’t taste it. A woman dressed in the spirit of Endora came out to look at the puddle too, but she didn’t make any magical motions or anything. Perhaps her charms are more of the silent variety.

Last year at this time we flew to Denver on a flight populated with rich, snobby kids who terrorized the plane, demanded alcohol (at 15 years old) and acted haughty with an air of entitlement about them. I don’t miss them on this flight.

Earl has switched to Doodle Jump.

En route.

So Earl and I are on our way to San Francisco. I’m writing this quick little entry from Newark, which is definitely not San Francisco. It’s Newark.

We have never been to San Francisco. It should be an investing extra long weekend. We’ll probably have a few pictures to share and I’m hoping to run into a few bloggers I’ve never met in person.

It should be a fun time.

Prop.