January 31, 2005

Earl asked me last night why I head home for lunch every day. After all, it’s a 10-15 minute drive each way and that can chew up almost half of my lunch hour.

So that got me pondering as to why I do head home for lunch. I guess because it breaks up the day. It divides the workday into two distinct halves. With it being winter and all, I’m not really excited about going for a walk or just sitting in the car and stealing someone’s internet to surf on my PowerBook, it’s just too damn cold to do that. I think once the sane weather returns, I will enjoy those activities again.

Coming home for lunch also keeps me grounded. I can pet the cat, check phone messages and the parade of ebay shipments and write in my blog in the comfort of our home. Now that life has settled down pretty well, with Earl and his promotion, my new job and everything, I can actually take the time to enjoy our home. It’s soothing to sit and relax without the distractions of the work environment. And I’m determined to not suffer from the burnout I had on my previous job.

So I guess that’s why I head home for lunch every day. So I can reset my psyche. It keeps me from crashing.

Ever since I’ve started writing in my blog back in 2000, I’ve occasionally written about searching for a simpler life. Less drama. More down to Earth. I think I’m succeeding in my quest.

Let me just say from the get go that though I feel I’m succeeding on what I envision, I can’t say that I’m anywhere closer to being down to Earth. It’s just not in my nature. And that’s o.k. I pride myself on the fact that I’m a dreamer. I believe in all sorts of supernatural, extraterrestrial and paranormal stuff. I guess I frequently dance on the “lunatic fringe”. But I accept that and I like it.

No, it’s the simpler approach to life that has me feeling quite content these days. For example, I enjoy cooking supper. I no longer have the need to have a waiter or waitress bring me my meal. I feel a certain sense of accomplishment by placing a well balanced, tasty bunch of goodness on the dinner table. I know, it’s very Samantha Stephens of me to feel this way, but there’s something to be said for shunning the jet set and living the comfortable life.

There’s a certain amount of delight for me going to work each and every day and contributing to the team that I work with. I no longer have to be in command to feel accomplishment. I enjoy being an equal with a great group of people. I no longer have to live up to the superficial nonsense of “ratings”, I just have to make sure customers are happy.

I enjoy cleaning the house. I never thought that I would say that, but again, it’s that accomplishment thing. Who knew that I would be happy being the naked maid?

I feel good about myself. I accept the fact that I’m never going to have the buff body of a 21 year old. Hell, I had a “pop gut” at age 7. But I get my fair share of looks, Earl seems quite content with what he sees and I’m happy with what I see in the mirror. As long as I stay on the path I’m on these days, I’m good. I think taking care of lingering health issues, like my nagging wisdom teeth and my plumbing problems, is helping me feel better about myself. It’s just easier to deal with the bad and getting it over with rather than worrying about it all the time. Perhaps typing that last statement gives me comfort. A positive reinforcement.

And finally, I can not believe that Earl and I have been together for almost nine years. We met nine years ago! In ways it seems like yesterday, in others it seems like a lifetime. It’s unbelievable. I know I gush like school boy who got lucky at the prom, but… Wow. It’s all so very incredible.

Yes, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Life is good. It’s wonderful to be relatively free of complaints. I look forward to tomorrow.