Through The Stargate. Sort Of.

So the medical saga continues. Today I had to go for a CAT-SCAN, which I guess is properly called a CT-SCAN. Or maybe it’s not. Who knows.

I had a scan back in 2000 when they were trying to figure out if I had a brain tumor or something else going odd with my head. They never found anything. Wrong with me, that is. They found the usual stuff in my head, just nothing unusual. Which I find a little humorous since if I was asked for three words to describe me, one of them would definitely be unusual. Another would be odd. I’d like to think that people would use likeable or even loveable for the third word, but I don’t think the question has actually been asked. It’s all hypothetical.

So I’ve undergone this little procedure before. The best part was that they didn’t have to inject any dye in me this time. Which is a good thing, because they were scanning my abdominal area, and I don’t think I could have taken pissing dye. That would have freaked me out. Plus, the dye made me feel a little sick to my stomach, even though they assured me it wouldn’t.

Anyways, they had me pull down my pants, hop up on the table and pass through this mini version of the Stargate. Here’s a funny thing – I got dressed in the dark this morning and had no idea which boxer shorts I had pulled out of the dresser drawers. Turns out they were red, white and blue boxer shorts! Earl asked if I ran them up the flag pole for the stargate tech. I told him I wasn’t inspired enough. I love it when we talk in code.

So the table moved me to position and a curt, electronic voice said “BREATHE”. So I did. Then it said, TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND HOLD, with all the warmth of an ice box. And hold my breath I did, for 22 seconds to be exact. While I was holding my breath, the table slid me through the mini Stargate, where my feet entered another dimension briefly (lack of oxygen no doubt) and my abdomen was scanned faster than a head of lettuce at Wegman’s.

So I’ll get the results in a couple of weeks when I go for my follow up appointment. They think I might have a kidney stone. If they get rid of it, perhaps I’ll lose an extra pound!


Like father, like son… Tom is spending the night at the vet’s. He needs to have his teeth cleaned in the morning, plus a urine test to make sure he’s free of an infection he had a month or so ago. I will never understand people that say they don’t like cats. Our home doesn’t feel right tonight without the patter of paws.