April 5, 2011

Disciplined.

One of the things I admire about my father is his sense of discipline. He has always amazed me in that way; if there’s a job to be done, he does it. If he feels a sense of procrastination I don’t know that he would ever say anything out loud about the subject, but I suspect that he wouldn’t procrastinate about it in the first place. This sense of discipline is something that I have always aspired to but rarely found. I still aspire to it. I hope I’m getting closer to that goal.

Yesterday I mentioned that I was going to calm down on absolute terms: I will always do this or I will never do that. Today is the second day in a row that I have refrained from picking up an iced tea at the drive thru at lunch time. Let’s see if tomorrow will be the third day in a row. I suspect it will be. This “one day at a time” approach is my attempt at being disciplined at something. On day two it’s working. I will strive to make it continue.

I have dreams about being a self-employed web developer, contracting my services to those that need them. This is a ways off in my future, after all, I have a really good gig right now, but I can’t see working for someone and earning a paycheck from someone else for the rest of my life. I want to live under my own steam; it is my hard work and my hard work alone (with the support of the husbear and my family, of course) that will determine whether I make it or not. I don’t want to share an annual pay raise budget with others on a team. I can do the teamwork thing, and I think I do it quite well, but ultimately I want to be the one calling the shots over my own success. I already know I have control issues. A disciplined approach will help keep them in check.

The disciplined aspect of my father’s personality afforded him the opportunity, along with his siblings, to have a successful business for many years. I learned a lot from his experiences with the business and I feel that using what I observed there, coupling it with my own talents and then just taking it one day at a time, will give me the opportunity to someday make a serious go of having my own business.

I will get there. With a sure and steady step, one day at a time.

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