Sometimes, you just don’t have the bandwidth to read the woes of other folks as they share their life experiences on social media, especially folks you’ve never met in person. That’s OK. It’s good to be there for other people but it’s better to take care of your mental health.
You are strongest for others when you are strongest for yourself. Always take care of yourself.
I have been focusing on the gratitude I have for my life. This is rather a broad statement, but in a world that seems to focus on the negative, in these times it’s important for me to focus on the positive. People voted in the U.S. elections for negative reasons. I figure the way to figure this negativity is to be thankful for all that’s right in the world and put as much positivity as possible out there.
Sometimes I find this a difficult thing to do.
As part of my daily journaling practice I’ve been specifically writing down a recognition of the gratitude I’ve felt during the day, no matter how big or small. Even the smallest steps forward are still a step forward.
I’m good with that.
Today I’m grateful for having this blog and having the fortitude to share my feelings out loud like this. I don’t know if anyone reads these entries, and it’s a heck of a lot cheaper than going to a therapist. But if my words make even one person smile today, then I’ve shared some positive energy.
And we need all we can get.
Last weekend I hiked up to Douglas Springs Campground in Saguaro National Park East. It was a great hike with some fantastic views. It was a long hike, clocking in at just under 14 miles.
The whole experience was definitely worth the effort.
Truman enjoys staying close, but not too close, when I’m working. He is not one for sitting on my lap or jumping on the desk or anything like that. If he’s not on the floor, he’s on the cat tree in my office, which gives him a nice view out the window and to all the strange humans on a Zoom call.
Earl and I had a nice walk around Madera Canyon this afternoon. I decided to use up some of my remaining vacation time; this was a great way to do it.
“Doing the verbs, not trying to be the nouns.”
This phrase in this video by Ryan Holiday really struck me in a motivational way when I heard it this morning. I have followed Ryan Holiday’s work for some time. I was happy to see his video come across my feed from BigThink on YouTube.
Let go of the labels.
I’m sitting on our “ampitheatre”. The view looks like this:
Those two photos turned out better than expected, considering I just spun my MacBook Air around and pointed the webcam at the view. Hmmm.
Anyway, I’m out back, looking over our 2 1/2 acres, and hearing coyotes making a ruckus on the other side of the wash. This, in turn, is getting the dogs at the neighbors worked up. So there’s barking from them and a yip yip party from the coyotes. A bird to my right is making some noise as well. Lucky and Jinx are silent on the matter. They’re content in the house.
I think about these coyotes that have their yip yip party together, doing the whole ‘travel in packs’ thing. Good for them.
Today I remarked on Mastodon that I’m feeling like I don’t have a tribe. Oh, I have a wonderful family, both here at the house and back East, but outside of that, I don’t really have a lot of folks I would consider part of a tribe in these parts.
I attribute this feeling to growing older and my expectations of and approach to life changing as time passes. My politics are left of center but nowhere near the “far left”. For going out and socializing I’m content in a quiet beer and/or sports pub enjoying that sort of thing versus going to a gay bar and thump thump thumping my way through a sweaty crowd in time to a remix of a song from the ‘80s that the boys think is da bomb. I don’t vape in any flavor. I don’t identify as “queer”; in truth I identify as “fatigued”, but if I had to put a label on my sexuality, despite my Uncle Arthur like antics on my videos, I’m “more guy than gay”. I feel like mainstream entertainment like television shows has been dumbed down to Lippincott Reader K, and honestly, I have little patience for the willful ignorance that has plagued this 2020s society.
Boy I sound cranky. Small wonder I don’t have a lot of friends.
I talked to my friend Matt back east yesterday and it was so wonderful to have a conversation with him. I’m hoping to make a trip to see him some time next year. He’s the older brother I never had.
I get that I have a good life. I actually have a great life. And it’s not like I’m no longer a loner. I’m still very much a loner, I’m just a loner that wants to be around likeminded people once in a while. The digital connections are enjoyable but not a replacement. Maybe I need to talk to a therapist or something. It’d be like a paid tribe, I guess.
I attribute some of these feelings to the head cold I’ve had this week. I’ve been going to bed early and we haven’t done much of anything. Plus, the holidays are looming and for the past decade or so I haven’t really felt the excitement of the holidays. Earl has insisted we light up the Christmas decorations even though it isn’t even Thanksgiving yet.
I’m too fatigued to stand my ground so let the rest of the family have some extra holiday joy.
Maybe it’ll be contagious.
Kevquirk recently shared a blog post highlighting A Nun Answering Questions in a YouTube video. I watched the entire video and found it absolutely fascinating.
I have always found nuns a little scary because I’ve heard the stereotypical stories about knuckles being slapped in Catholic School and in other anecdotes they’ve always been described as so stony and hard.
This video changed my perspective quite a bit. I am happy to have watched this video.
Just a guy with a husband. We’ve been together 28 years and he still makes me see fireworks on a daily basis. Hiker. Storm Chaser. Private Pilot. Tech Guy. Hackerish.
Weird? Eccentric!
