Ponderings and Musings

So every year I start out the New Year with resolutions and goals. I ask myself, “What am I going to do this year to make me a better person?” I usually come up with a list of bullet points highlighting various areas of my life; financial goals, career goals and health goals. The latter usually includes shedding 15-20 pounds so that I can look like one of those models you see on the cover of Men’s Health; you know the guys, they’re the ones that the masses get all breathless about because they have a flat stomach, a full head of hair, arms that pop, a smile that dazzles everyone and a face that betrays their age by at least 10 years. After trying for the past couple of decades I have yet to obtain that magazine standard.

This year, I have just one bullet point on my list of New Year’s Resolutions.

* Be Happy

That’s it. That’s all I got. I have finally come to the realization that once I’m happy, everything else will fit into place. Being happy with who I am leads to be confident in who I am. And being confident in who I am leads me to finding new opportunities where I need to find them in my life. And this all starts with being happy with my physical appearance.

I weigh myself every morning. A lot of people say that this is a foolish thing to do, but quite frankly, I like to know what I weigh. In the past I did this so that I would avoid eating like a bird so that I could shed a few pounds here and there, but I’m not going to do this anymore. I’m still going to weigh myself, but it’s so I can gauge where I am and stay three steps ahead of a heart attack or something like that. I tweeted my weight for the first time in my life this morning; at last check I weight 206.4 pounds. I’ve weighed more in my life and I hav e certainly weighed less. A month ago, the 206.4 would have bothered me. A lot. But today it doesn’t, because if the weather was cooperative and I had a few practice runs, I could still do what I love to do, and that’s ride my road bike for 80 miles or so. I can still do that and I want to still be able to do that because it makes me happy.

My husband and family and friends love me for who I am. No one gasps in horror when I walk into a room. If they do, it’s probably because my beard has bushed out like some sort of fuzzy dog or because I’m wearing mismatched clothes or something equally horrific. I’ve had only two people in recent memory tell me that “wow, I’ve really gained weight” and quite frankly they’re not part of my life anymore because a comment like that is only a symptom of a deeper problem.

Steve Jobs once remarked that we shouldn’t do something day in and day out if we are not happy doing it. So I look myself in the mirror in the morning and ask myself, “Am I happy?”

The answer is an unequivocal ‘yes’. I am a very happy man. I can adjust a little bit here and there to sort of tweak the package for maximum enjoyment but as a whole, I’m a happy guy.

And as long as that remains true, I am going to meet my New Year’s resolution.

Well the 48 hour bug that plagued me starting in the wee hours of Saturday morning was kind enough to make a hasty departure in the wee hours of Monday morning. I have been feeling much better today. Now I’m left to wonder where the heck the weekend went. It doesn’t seem possible that I am going back to work tomorrow morning. I guess three days go by quickly when you’re in a NyQuil induced haze.

I have heard on the street that some folks purposely consume too much NyQuil in order to hallucinate. I find this incomprehensible, because NyQuil just makes me mean. Back when I would consume more alcohol than I should, I wasn’t a mean drunk, but there’s something in the over the counter cold and allergy medications that makes me just mean. I’m snappy and cranky and not in a sitcomy, sarcastic sort of way. I should just stay away from the stuff. I probably will.

Earl and I celebrated New Year’s Eve by watching two movies courtesy of iTunes: “Friends With Benefits” and “My Idiot Brother”. They were both enjoyable movies for what they were, though I have to admit that I enjoyed the former more. “My Idiot Brother” was kind of like “Little Miss Sunshine” in spirit, but it didn’t quite come to the same level of twisted comedy like ‘Sunshine’ did. This afternoon we went and saw the latest installment of “Sherlock Holmes.”  How I enjoy the twists and turns of a good plot and this particular movie did a fairly good job of keeping me engaged as far as the plot goes. Truth be known, I think the cinematography is what really kept me engaged. I loved the slow motion effects that were employed generously throughout the movie. The female lead, Noomi Rapace, looked a little bit like Jennifer Saunders (from AbFab) in her gypsy gear but looking at photos online I guess she doesn’t really resemble Jenn in real life. Well, maybe a little bit.

Earl and I caught up on “Hot In Cleveland” courtesy of the DVR over the weekend as well. I have a new straight man crush, and that title for 2012 goes to Sean O’Bryan, who played Melanie’s boyfriend Andy in the 12/28 episode, “One Thing Or A Mother”. I guess it was because they were calling him a ‘Pooh Bear’ throughout the episode, but he was rather woofy in his soccer uniform. I wonder if there are photos of him somewhere online where he has a beard, because he could easily be an honorary bear if that is the case.

Not the best picture of Sean O’Bryan.

I find it humorous that OS X Lion tries to autocorrect “woofy” to “woody”.

So tomorrow I am back to work and ready to go crazy with The Big Project. I’ll be writing code to my little heart’s content for the next several weeks. I do not find this to be unpleasant.

Despite the 48 hour bug that visited for the proper amount of time, I feel that 2012 is off to a good start. As I said on Twitter and Facebook, “Rock it like it’s the last year of the Mayan calendar!”

Nothing says “Happy New Year” and gives one the feeling of starting 2012 off with a fresh start more than bout of insomnia. I’m wide awake at 3:16 a.m., having gone to bed at 1:00 a.m.  My nose is running a marathon. If I take NyQuil again I’ll be mean tomorrow and I don’t want to be mean.

My head is racing with thoughts of Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin, the two television personalities that we rang the New Year in. Honestly, we did take a brief glimpse at Ryan Seacrest and Dick Clark and bless his aged heart, but it’s just too depressing for us to watch Dick Clark try to do his part of the telecast and quite frankly, the Kathy/Andy train is much more entertaining to watch. Anderson Cooper is so cute with his alternating blushing and giggling. Good times.

Screw it, I’m going to take the damn NyQuil and blog until I fall asleep.

I don’t really watch a lot of Anderson Cooper outside of the New Year’s celebration. I might watch something he says here and there but I don’t watch a lot of CNN. I do more reading and listening to political talk shows on the radio than actually watching journalists on television. Perhaps in 2012 I should become more acquainted with Mr. Cooper. I hear good things about him and his tittering with Kathy Griffin is an amusing side of him, perhaps his news gathering skills are equally interesting.

I didn’t really start feeling congested or have this runny nose until I went to bed two hours ago. Now that we have heat in our bedroom for the first time in two years, I’m wondering if it’s actually a little too warm in there and my body is saying WTF? in retaliation for the environmental changes. I’m finding myself wishing that we could sleep in the dry air of the U.S. southwest, but I don’t see that happening anytime soon.

I’m excited about the New Year and all the possibilities and hope that come along with resetting the counter to 1/1. I hope I can get enough sleep to start it off on the right foot.

Happy New Year to all!!!

The daily update on the internal website at work occasionally has some nuggets of wisdom that make me feel just a little bit better. Today is one of those days. I plan on keeping these sentiments in the forefront as we move into 2012.

12/30/2011
Once a year, we post this essay written by Ann Landers for Jan. 1, 1997. Don’t groan – take a glance at it and you may see some good thoughts for 2012. Happy New Year!

Let this coming year be better than all the others. Vow to do some of the things you’ve always wanted to do but couldn’t find the time for. Call up a forgotten friend. Drop an old grudge and replace it with some pleasant memories. Share a funny story with someone whose spirits are dragging. A good laugh can be very good medicine.

Vow not to make a promise you don’t think you can keep. Pay a debt. Give a soft answer. Free yourself of envy and malice. Encourage some youth to do his or her best. Share your experience and offer support. Young people need role models.

Make a genuine effort to stay in closer touch with family and friends. Stop magnifying small problems and shooting from the lip. Words that you have to eat can be hard to digest.

Find the time to be kind and thoughtful. All of us have the same allotment: 24 hours a day. Give a compliment. It might give someone a badly needed lift.

Think things through. Forgive an injustice. Listen more. Be kind. Apologize when you realize you are wrong. An apology never diminishes a person. It elevates him. Don’t blow your own horn. If you’ve done something praiseworthy, someone will notice eventually.

Try to understand a point of view that differs from yours. Little is all one way or another. Examine demands you make on others.

Lighten up. When you feel like blowing your top, ask yourself, “Will it matter a week from today?” Laugh the loudest when the joke is on you. The sure way to have a friend is to be one. We are all connected by your humanity, and we need each other. Avoid malcontents and pessimists. They drag you down and contribute nothing.

Don’t discourage a beginner from trying something risky. Nothing ventured means nothing gained. Be optimistic. The can-do spirit is the fuel that makes things go.

Go to war against animosity and complacency. Express your gratitude. Give credit when it’s due – and even when it isn’t. It will make you look good. Read something uplifting. Deep-six the trash. You wouldn’t eat garbage, why put it in your head? Don’t abandon your old-fashioned principles. They never go out of style. When courage is needed, ask yourself, “If not me, who? If not now, when?”

Take better care of yourself. Remember, you’re all you’ve got. Pass up that second helping. You really don’t need it. Vow to eat more sensibly. You’ll feel better and look better, too. Don’t put up with secondhand smoke. Nobody has the right to pollute your air or give you cancer. If someone says, “This is a free country,” remind him or her that the country may be free but no person is free if he has a habit he can’t control.

Return those books you borrowed. Reschedule that missed dental appointment. Clean out your closet. Take those photos out of the drawer and put them in an album. If you see litter on the sidewalk, pick it up. Give yourself a reality check. Phoniness is transparent and tiresome. Take pleasure in the beauty and the wonders of nature.

Walk tall and smile more. You’ll look 10 years younger. Don’t be afraid to say “I love you.” Say it again. They are the sweetest words in the world. If you have love in your life, it can be the best year ever.

So every holiday season Earl and I like to reward a server in a restaurant with a larger than normal tip. It’s our way of saying “thank you” to those that are squarely unappreciated by the public as a whole. The folks that strive to bring us a pleasant dining experience should be appreciated. We’ve seen too many well-intentioned folks get hollered at by surly customers, though on the flip side we’ve had a few that have rubbed us the wrong way but in even the worst of situations we’ve tried to keep it classy.

I think I’m digressing.

With the events and subsequent traveling that has taken place during the month of December, Earl and I have been eating out more than normal. I think it was when we were down in Bucks County, Pa. that I started asking him “Is this the one?”, referring to the server that we would reward with our holiday tip. I guess we weren’t feeling it because we kept our tipping at our standard approximately 20%, though we did give a slight bit extra to the lovely server that helped us out at that bistro that sits in the middle of Cherry Hill Mall in Cherry Hill, N.J.

Today Earl and I went shopping with the rest of the world, per our usual custom of buying ourselves something on the 26th of December, which is the anniversary of our original commitment ceremony. (Our wedding rings have been worn for 15 years as of today!) Since tomorrow is work day, I wanted to get home from the shopping excursion at a reasonable time, so we headed home from Albany around 4:30 p.m. Now I have mentioned a hundred or more times that I don’t really like driving the Thruway anymore, it’s wicked boring and since I could potentially drive the road everyday for work, I don’t really get my kicks on the toll road anymore. So I started heading home on Route 20. As we made our way to the outskirts of Albany, I asked Earl what he was in the mood for in the way of a meal on the way home. He said he didn’t care as long as he didn’t cook, and then he rattled off a few suggestions.

One of the cool things about US Route 20 in the eastern part of the Empire State is that it’s rural. Really rural. Like, there’s nothing but farm land rural. When he began mentioning a few places like a diner, or a Panera or a locally owned family restaurant, I suddenly realized that the best I would be able to drum up on our way home was the McDonalds attached to a gas station in the small village of Richfield Springs.

I turned north and headed to my stomping grounds around work. I instantly knew where I wanted to go; an Italian bistro that is creatively named “Plaza’s Italian Bistro” in the small city of Gloversville.

Our server’s name was Isaiah. A young lad in his 20s or so, he was very courteous, very efficient and more importantly, very charismatic and friendly without forcing it or being obnoxious about it. We often compare the friendliness of the server to a woman named Linda who worked at a place named Jack Appleseed’s back in the day; she would put her head up in the lamp that hung over the table and say she was wearing a hat. Then she would snort with laughter, somewhat like Chrissy Snow on “Three’s Company”.

That wasn’t our thing.

Since Isaiah went out of our way to make our dining experience comfortable, pleasant and not too rushed or not too long, he was dubbed the “holiday recipient of the week” where we tipped him generously and added a happy face and a hearty, handwritten “Happy New Year”. We left the restaurant right after signing the bill. As we walked outside, I saw Earl look in one of the windows, where Isaiah was picking up the bill, saw the note and the tip and looked around (presumably for us) and then smiled.

We hope he had a great night. We certainly did.

– Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

I haven’t been sleeping very well the last couple of nights. The stress of the holidays, the passing of our fathers, worrying about getting everything that is expected to get done for both personal and work stuff getting done, these things have been weighing heavily on my mind.
 
I sometimes forget that I have a history of needlessly worrying. It’s something that I leaned when I was a young boy. You think that after all these years I would know better.
 
I found joy in the day when I saw everyone’s eyes light up as they were opening their gifts this morning. Though my exercises in shopping were rather hurried this year, it seems that I still did something right, because the genuine pleasure displayed when folks opened their gifts warmed my heart. My mother had wanted tickets to see “Celtic Woman” when they came to town, but she didn’t know that I new that. She was very emotional when she found out that she had tickets to the show. Earl seemed to love the gifts that I got him.  Scott and Jamie were excited about their gifts as well. Sharing happiness, that’s what the holiday are about.  Spread some joy. 
 
We made the trek to my Dad’s house where members of that side of the family were assembled.  A mixture of tears, smiles and conversation. All good. Then we went to have dinner with my mom, where we shared more smiles, tears and conversation.  Again, all good.
 
I was afraid that I wouldn’t find joy in the holiday this year, but again, I worried for no reason. For there was much joy to be found and much joy to be shared.  

It must have been the sound of reindeer hooves on the roof that woke me up just a few minutes ago.

A joyous Christmas to all!