I should probably be upset but I’m not. I just got a speeding ticket whilst on my way from the office to home for lunch. I was driving 72 MPH in a 55 MPH. The freeway I was driving on is four lanes across at the point where I got stopped for speeding. He had a clear shot of me with the laser gun because no one else was on the road. The road was obviously designed to be posted 65 MPH but even it was I would still be exceeding the speed limit.

I wish I could say that I cared that I was stopped for speeding but I really don’t. I’ll just have to be a little more conscious of how fast I drive on open stretches of highway. It’s easier to be bunched up in traffic cruising along at 80. Then they have their pick of who to stop.

The trooper that stopped me is named Officer Geraldo Rivera. He probably has “G. RIVERA” on his name plate so he doesn’t catch shit for that. He looked younger than me, and the famous Geraldo Rivera wasn’t famous until well after my single digit years, so his parents probably didn’t know better. When I saw his name on the ticket I decided to not be snarky at him.

Since I was caught speeding in the left hand lane I pulled over to the left shoulder when he turned on his lights. This made him walk through a snowbank and a mud puddle.

Snark level achieved.