Let’s Name Him Ditto.

As I was taking the time to catch on the world’s events today, I noticed a little furry face plastered all over the cable news networks and the internet. He’s a little kitten, just a cute as can be. He was in a carrying case, around eight weeks old, marveling at the world. Come to find out, he cost $50,000. And he’s a clone.

I find this very sad for a number of reasons. First of all, and most importantly, cloning is not an exact science by any stretch of the imagination. There’s about a million and a half things that can go wrong, and since cloning is very new, we don’t know what can happen down the road to something that is cloned. Health risks, trauma… who knows? Dolly the sheep, the first cloned creature if I recall correctly, only lived six years. Her species’ average life span is 12 years.

Secondly, the woman that had this little guy cloned from his, well, donor because she missed her beloved pet so much. I get the feeling that she’s under the delusion that her cherished pet of 17 years is back from the dead. Of course, this is purely my belief, but I don’t think reincarnation works that way. Personally, I don’t believe that pets even reincarnate. They’re already perfect. They have no need to reincarnate the way humans do. Humans reincarnate so we can continue to experience life and learn lessons. She’s almost cheating the memory of her deceased pet by trying to Xerox him. Let him live on in her memory. Listen for and enjoy his spirit when he comes to visit, scampering around from The Other Side. Don’t cheapen his death by thinking you can play God and make a duplicate, because that’s not what’s happening here. You’re not fooling anyone.

Thirdly, can you imagine the pressure this little kitten is going to be up against? He’s going to be expected to behave exactly as his predecessor, because after all, he should be a duplicate copy of him. Any chance of him being himself in any way different than her former pet is going to be discouraged. This could make him very unhappy. Maybe “Fluffy version 1.0” didn’t like Meow Mix, but “Fluffy version 2.0” does. So sorry, you’re stuck with Friskies because that’s what “you” always liked before. That’s just mean. And delusional.

And lastly, the rich old bag spent $50,000 to have her cat cloned. $50,000! FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS!! Can you just take a moment and imagine how many cats and dogs could be rescued, or even just given more time to live at the animal shelter? There are thousands upon thousands of abandoned, abused and discarded pets that are just looking for a happy home, with a clock ticking away in the background. Even a $10,000 donation would help the local animal shelter immensely. But this old bat spent $50,000 to have her own designer kitten made. It makes me sick.

We Americans seem to be going too far away from nature and the natural order of things lately. The world is getting very weird. We’re forgetting our roots. We’re becoming very selfish. I hope the little kitten I saw today on the news grows up to be a happy and healthy cat in a loving home. And I hope he gets all the love he deserves. I just wish he didn’t have to grow up in such a fushed place and time.

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