Ponderings and Musings

I am sitting at the local Panera, where I believe that the natives have finally learned that it is not appropriate to ask for fries with their meal. They still haven’t broken the habit of standing as far away as possible from the counter before being called upon to place their order, but I can share a big sigh of relief that no one mentioned wanting fries with their happy meal for their screaming kid that is taking his pants off whilst standing on a chocolate chip cookie.

Even though it’s Friday in many parts of the world, it is Tuesday night in my world and tomorrow is a workday for me. It’s my quarterly turn of on call. Longtime gentle readers of my blog may remember the old job where I was on call every few weeks and on the brink of insanity under all circumstances. They newish gig I have doesn’t foster that type of response since on call isn’t nearly as involved as it was with the old job. I’m feeling good.

Other parts of the family are out exploring the world tonight. I’m in the mood to chase a thunderstorm. It seems like Mother Nature is giving me the opportunity to do so. I took some shots of an impressive line of clouds on the ride home.  It looked something like this.

The bark was much worse than the bite, because there was hardly any lightning and thunder, nary a tornado but plenty of rain. We get rain with everything now. It’s like the sprig of parsley on a mediocre dish. Rain always comes with the landscapes in these parts. One of my co-workers from the Dallas-Fort Worth office commented that he didn’t know it was so much like the northwest in these parts. I said that it usually isn’t unless this is the new norm.

I have received quite a few emails and tweets about my marriage post (the post previous to this one). Since writing that post the New York big wigs have announced that the NYS Senate will vote on the same sex marriage bill (they call it #SSM) tonight. Should the vote be the right one, I will be proposing to Earl before morning. We have dreamed about having a big shin dig. I think it’s high time that we finally did. I hope all of our family comes from all parts of the world to share the celebration with us.

I posted such random things when I am at Panera. I just noticed that the Turkey Focaccia sandwich looks less appetizing than your standard grilled ham and cheese made with welfare (yellow) cheese. At least cheese in a can would have spruced it up a little bit. Perhaps they need a sprig of parsley.

Earlier in the week I shared a few comments about some of the podcasts (netcasts) from the TWiT network. I have adjusted some of listening habits and am now focusing on TWiG, “This Week In Google”.  The regular participants of that particular podcast rock. I am a fan of geek girl Gina Trapani. She is an out lesbian, writes a book now and then, writes plenty of articles about all things tech but most importantly, she loves Chipotle and isn’t afraid to dance to a little bit of “Glee” like we all do. Along with CUNY professor Jeff Jarvis,  they join Leo LaPorte to talk about all things Google and the cloud. Google has made a few missteps along the way and I’m not a huge fan of ad-based products, but I have to admit that they write magnificent code, and ever since switching to my Android-based HTC Thunderbolt, I’ve learned a few good tips here and there.  I hope to shake Gina and Jeff’s hand someday. I think they make wonderful contributions to the community.

By the way, I’m becoming a bigger fan of the Google Chrome web browser. I actually run Chromium, the open source version that doesn’t have the Google branding in it, but it still allows me to sync with my Google account. It’s all good. I figure Google doesn’t have enough time to sit down and read my stuff. There are other more interesting people in the world.

And last but not least, I caved in and trimmed my mustache back but left the beard untouched. I have a habit of chewing on my mustache when it’s long. The trimmed ‘stache with big beard makes me look trendy. Especially when I have my hat to the back.

I vividly remember my first kiss. Now I’m not talking about the first kiss I had, sometimes in the late 1970s, when I stole a kiss from a girl named Lisa behind one of the airplane hangers on a Sunday afternoon. I’m talking about my first _real_ kiss, which took place in a 1982 Dodge Omni, behind Alumni Hall at SUNY Fredonia in the fall of 1986. It was quick, a parting gesture of a fantastic evening of a lovely dinner in the small college town. His name was Steve and he looked like Herbie, the one who wanted to be a dentist. Though I had kissed many times before that moment; heck, I had even copped a few feels, removed a bra or two and even tried to do it a few times before then with a lovely girl named Kristi, that kiss in the 1982 Dodge Omni behind Alumni Hall was just a confirmation of what I had known all along. I like guys. It was like the protective cover had been removed from the pane of glass and I could see ahead clearly for the first time in my life.

It was in November 1995 when I first saw the huge fireworks in my head. I had seen a sparkler or two along the way up until then, but the moment I spotted a man named Earl standing in the corner opposite of the DJ booth I was working in, I saw huge fireworks exploding in my head and I knew that I was somehow, somewhere, going to spend the rest of my life with that man. I just knew it, and I wasn’t going to accept any other answer along that path. Luckily, Earl knew it too. After a bit, the “happily ever after” came to life and we had a small, private commitment ceremony at Penn’s Landing late in 1996. Though the ceremony did not take place in a church, we opened our hearts to each other and to a “higher power”; many in this part of the world call him God. Personally, I think he’s much more than any “him” would aspire to be, so I just think of all of it as a Higher Power. I figure if man is the best that this world can do then we have fallen way behind in the curriculum.

I talk about fireworks and first kisses and the like because the New York Senate is debating whether to approve legislation for same sex marriage again today. I will be the first one to tell you that I am tired of hearing about the debates of the topic. I’m sick of reading about people doing and saying hateful things all in the name of their love, the only love that is valid. I’m weary of people saying that if it is legal for me to marry Earl, my one true love, then somewhere in the country, someone must be allowed to marry their cat because it feels right to them.

I imagine that my grandfather saw fireworks when he met my grandmother, and that applies to both sides of the family. I remember the slightly mischievous grin my grandfather got when he sat at the dining room table next to my grandmother. I remember the way my aunt’s eyes would light up when she saw my uncle, I am able to decipher the excitement my father exuded in his own unique way of expressing himself when he sees his wife (either version 1 or version 2). I see love and it is the same kind of emotion that fuels the fireworks that I saw this morning when Earl was making my lunch in the kitchen. The same fireworks I saw in 1995 but even stronger. I tell him everyday, “I fell in love with you today.” And it’s true.

I believe that the folks that protest same sex marriage have varying motivations that all share the same undercurrent: fear. I believe they fear change. I believe they fear obsolescence. Perhaps they fear that if nothing mean and nasty happens when a gay couple gets married that this must mean that there are more inaccuracies in their beliefs. I understand that this lack of vengeful response from a higher power might rock their faith. I get that; they believe out of fear, not out of love. “If I don’t do this, then something really bad is going to happen to me for eternity.” If that’s their belief then I say great, whatever gets you through the day. Just don’t impose your beliefs on me. My business is not your business. And marriage shouldn’t be a governmental business. The folks that scream for smaller government are always wanting government to intervene on gay marriage. If it weren’t for the fees for the license, the government wouldn’t care less. They just want the filing fees and the like.

We have no desire to get married in a church. We believe that the higher power is everywhere and that it is not confined to a man building full of lavish adornments. When we get married, and we definitely will, it will be a celebration of our love and a symbol of the commitment we have lived for the past 15 years. That commitment deserves the legal recognitions afforded to our heterosexual counterparts, because the government has made it their business. Our love is just a strong, if not stronger, than all the straight marriages that we know.

Living in constant fear must suck. If people lived with a motive of love, celebrating all that was around us, instead of telling the world how wrong it is for us to love someone of the same sex, when we know that we were made this way, the world would be a much better place. There has been more bloodshed in the name of religion over any other reason.

There is going to come a day when I am going to have to make decisions for Earl and/or vice versa. Luckily, we have legal paperwork in place to grant us the ability to do so, but the legalities of this only extend so far because we are not able to get legally married. (Heaven help anyone that would try to stand in my way. The only thing that will ever keep me apart from Earl is death, and if necessary, I will go to that point in a most spectacular fashion to protect the one that I love.) Can a married couple imagine what it is like to be kept apart from their hospitalized spouse? Can a mother or father imagine what it’s like to have their kids taken away because the government hasn’t sanctioned their love? I didn’t think so. Imagine how you would feel today knowing that the government was voting on your right to legally love someone. Think about that for a moment.

Today the New York Senate will most likely vote on this hot topic. Let’s hope that they vote with their heart and their conscience and not out of fear.

Even though yesterday was Monday, today is my Friday. Yep, it’s an on-call week and to compensate for this I need to rearrange the days of the week again. To celebrate this joyous occasion, I have requested that Mother Earth take it’s time with the rotation tonight and slow down just a bit to make this the longest day of the year. I like to think that I have that power.

I must admit that it is an absolutely gorgeous day today, a perfect way to kick off the real beginning of summer. I have a couple of things planned for my day off tomorrow but nothing strenuous. I want to save the strenuous stuff for work on Thursday and Friday when we officially kick off the Big Project that I am taking part in for the company.

I have found just one thing that I miss from having the iPhone and that’s using Instagram. I am taking just as many pictures as I did before, in fact I’m taking more photos than I did before because my HTC Thunderbolt has a gorgeous camera. It just dawned on me when typing this sentence that I can easily share these photos with my Tumblr account. Perhaps I’ll do that. Flickr is too much work at times and I’m not big on sharing every single photo I take on Facebook. I can’t groove on Facebook like I can other services or even on this blog. I don’t know why this is the case but I’m sure it’s just one of the many quirks of my personality.

Since I have been letting the beard grow randomly and untamed for the past seven weeks, people are starting to notice and make comments. I’m often asked when it is going to be trimmed down for summer. I tell them that I might consider it around my birthday (which is in mid July). They ask if it itches. I tell them no, as I no longer have fleas.

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I have been contemplating buying another vehicle. The 2005 Acura RSX has been serving me well and is quite comfortable for commuting back and forth to work and the like, but it’s rather small if I want to take more than one person with me. We once picked Jamie up in Buffalo on our way back from St. Louis and I think we had to fold him up to a more compact size in order to get him to fit into the back seat.

I have had my eye on another Jeep.

The thing about buying a new Jeep is that I don’t really like the new body style that they introduced in 2007. It looks a little too modern for me. I know that Jeep has made strides in making it quite comfortable for the whole family, including the introduction of a four-door model, but there’s just something about the new style that doesn’t feel ‘raw’ enough to me. So I have been looking at the last of the older body styles on line. They look appealing and I could see me buying one, especially a Rubicon.

But then I start to wonder why I want another vehicle.

There’s nothing wrong with the Acura. It drives beautiful, is relatively maintenance free and more importantly is completely paid off. The only downside to it is that it has high taste in that it will only sip premium fuel, but it keeps the sips reasonable. Commuting expenses are reasonable given the economy and the price of fuel. And as I mentioned before, I still love it and it feels good to drive.

There’s a part of me that wants to drive off-road. I want to take a Jeep and go up the side of a gravel bed, much like we did when we were kids. I want to take it out on the beach, though right off the top of my head I can’t think of a beach nearby where I can do that. I want to drive back roads, through the woods. I don’t want the worry about my suspension handling the rougher roads.

But when do I have time to do these things?

Our former Jeep is living a very happy life with our friend Scott and it was absolutely the right thing to do to sell it when we did. No regrets there. But I think the next Jeep needs to be something a little tougher and with a used one. But I wonder what need I’m trying to fulfill by getting another Jeep.

I guess I can be complicated.

So first the first time this season I am sitting on the back patio with my MacBook enjoying the late spring day. It’s funny to think that it is still spring, but it is for the next 10 days or so. After all we have had record heat this past week. Of course the weekend has been rainy and chilly. It’s only 66º F right now.

I’m still quite content.

The weekend has been mostly about relaxing and getting stuff done around the house. While everyone was still asleep I relocated two computers and extended the range of the wireless network to all points in the house so I could easily watch the “Batman: The Brave and the Bold” cartoon on the kitchen computer. That computer is named hestia. Hestia replaces our old television we had in the corner before we remodeled the kitchen earlier this spring.

Last night we went to see “X-Men: First Class”. I enjoyed the movie very much and was delighted to see Rose Byrne as Moira. We had just seen her a couple of weeks ago in “Bridesmaids” and I have to admit that she has moved to the top of the list of my favorite females. She is stunning.

Rose Byrne as Moira MacTaggert.

There are a lot of birds singing here in the back yard. They are probably spreading the word that the five bird feeders have been refilled and are now quality rest areas again. Occasionally a random bird will stop by, examine the situation, poop and then move on. On the feeders closest to the house they seem to favor one feeder over the other but I don’t know why.

Time to get back to relaxing.

I don’t know if I have ever mentioned on here that I work for a rather large telecommunications company. I work for Frontier Communications, on the largest, rural telecommunications providers in the states. The company tripled in size last year with the purchase of several Verizon properties in 14 states. We are still in the middle of transitioning those customers over to our systems.

Like many other companies, Frontier offers an incentive program to the employees that bring new customers to the company. This program is called “Take The Lead”. It’s a cool program and if Earl and I lived in Frontier’s territory we would definitely be using the services that contribute to my paycheck. The small town I grew up in is in Frontier’s territory. Many of my family members use the products that I help support everyday. By the way, I work in one of the nationwide Network Operations Centers.

The reason I am bringing this up is two-fold. First of all, if you live in Frontier’s territory and you’re looking to switch to their phone, internet or satellite television service through Dish, let me know so that I can “Take The Lead”. Company incentives are always good and it always looks good on my year-end review when I have a couple of these I can list on the various forms in HR. Plus, right now Frontier is offering double the incentive on leads, which can actually lead to triple digit incentives. Wicked cool.

The other and actually primary reason that I mention this is because I have pledged to take any monetary incentives given to me from “Take The Lead” and donate them to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society. This is my independent effort. You see, Earl’s mom died of MS 20 years ago. I never had the opportunity to meet his mom but this is my way of honoring her and thanking her for providing the man that still makes me see fireworks everyday. In addition, I know of other people that are living with MS and any contribution I can make to finding a cure for this disease has to be a good thing.

So please, if you feel so inclined, help me Take The Lead. If you are interested, please send me an email so that I can make sure you have the proper information and so I can answer any questions you may have. My email (translated to standard format) is: jp (two letters in front of) at jpnearl dot com. Take that spambots trying to figure that email address out.

Websites for your enjoyment:
Frontier Communications
National MS Society

Thank you.

Mother Nature has chosen to delight us during our lunch hour with a fairly hefty thunderstorm. The skies were flashy and loud as I got settled in for my lunch hour, but she seems to have moved on to another part of the county.

Just to be sure that I was safe in the car, I parked in a slightly different spot than usual so that I would be situated in between the two electric poles behind me, instead of parking directly in front of one. I didn’t want it to fall on the car if it got struck by lightning and it happened to fall in my direction.

It’s good to plan for these sorts of things.

I have had a reoccurring dream over the years that involves me getting struck by lightning. I’ve had this dream since elementary school. I’m not worried about that happening today though, because in the dream I am standing on some sort of porch or deck and I think I’m standing behind a mobile home. Since none of these elements are currently in place I have decided that today is not my day to be struck by lightning.

The light and sound show is fairly impressive though. We are suppose to get thunderstorms throughout the day. It may make for a lively ride home tonight.

We are just getting back from Chicago. The trip home took about 11 1/2 hours, with a total of 45 minutes of stopping time for rest stops and food. It’s so simple when you just get on Interstate 90 and drive. Traffic wasn’t bad.

I have much to write over the next couple of days once I catch my breath. 0530 comes early tomorrow, so I’ll keep this one short.

One quick thing to mention though; as we were driving between the Indiana state line and Toledo, I couldn’t help but let my mind wander to the type of landscape and plot of land I would like for us to have a house on when it’s time to retire. I might be getting a little Green Acres in all of this, but the flat lands of the midwest and the houses with trees around them, surrounded by acres and acres of farmland, is the ideal setting for me.

I hope the husbear agrees.