The Handyman Can.

A couple of days ago I came to the realization that Earl and I live in a new house. Granted, we’ve been here since December 1, but with all the running around we’ve been doing it seemed like we hadn’t had time to take the opportunity to make the house ours. So tonight I started a little project.

I’ve mentioned before that I collect old school clocks. The type that click ahead once a minute and are control by a master clock that is usually located in the school’s main office. I had these clocks all through the old house, and when we moved, we had to spend a considerable amount of time patching holes in walls and such because of my hack wiring job. I look back at what I did in the old house and can not believe that I was jamming wire through the walls using the end of a broom handle, while standing on the piano. To this day I wonder why Earl didn’t murder me.

I’ve been a little hesitant to put the clocks up in this house because of my hack wiring job in the last house. But Earl and I talked about it, and I decided to go ahead and put them up… but very neatly. So tonight I started drilling holes in walls and scoping out where I’m going to run wire and all that stuff. The wire I ordered online should arrive tomorrow, so tomorrow night I’ll be fishing wire through walls. I’m really good at fishing wire. And I actually ordered the correct wire, instead of using a mix of speaker wire, telephone wire and a lot of electrical tape. I’ll also take the opportunity to introduce myself to the attic. That should be interesting.

For some odd reason I think it amazes people when I tell them that I’m capable of this stuff. I don’t know why. I grew up near a farm. My family owns a lumber yard and hardware store. Granted, I liked hanging out in the office and doing the accounting and such, but I still picked up a considerable amount of Do-It-Yourselfer knowledge by osmosis or something. Earl was amazed early in our relationship because I knew the difference between “AC” and “CD” plywood. He also was amazed that I knew what waferboard was. I always enjoy dropping little bits of handyman chatter because it makes me sound butch. And I don’t mind wearing my pants plumber style and showing my butt crack on occasion.

So Earl is going to get a little surprise when he comes back from Ohio. The reassuring “tick tick” of the clock system, functional once again. Let’s just hope that when he gets home I’m not straddling a beam in the attic, legs plunged through the bedroom ceiling, waiting for someone to save me.

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