In keeping in line with the vanity theme started in my previous blog entry, I decided to peruse the Health and Beauty section of the local grocery store. Honestly, with Earl out of town, I had nothing better to do than figure out a better way to look pretty. After all, with people looking at my webcam (and sending me e-mail because of it!) a guy has to look his best, right?
The first thing I found was a new version of toothpaste. I’ve seen the commercials for Colgate’s “Simply White” and was intrigued, so I bought two. Let’s see if my teeth look whiter in two weeks like they allegedly should. For some reason Earl is obsessed with Mentadent, but I find the taste a little too sweet. Like I’m brushing my teeth with baking soda laden cotton candy. So I’m eager to try out this new brand. I also picked up a new toothbrush for work, since my after lunch toothbrush was originally purchased in the late 1990s, two offices ago. As I type that sentence, it makes me realize how gross that really is.
As I was walking through HBA (for all you guys and gals that never had the opportunity to work for a fine discount department store chain like I did years ago, HBA stands for ‘health and beauty aids’), I stopped by the shaving cream section as well. My face has never really recovered from shaving my beard off the first part of the year and I’ve been quite lazy about shaving, simply because it was a marginally painful experience. So lazy, in fact, that Earl told me just the other day (unprovoked, I may add) that if I had shown up to work in his office with the growth of beard I had at that moment, I would have been sent home for looking disheveled, WITHOUT pay. I think he was still pissy about the iMac discussion, but I could be wrong. Anyways, lo and behold, they had my shaving cream of choice, Rise “Baby Face” Super Foam. I hadn’t seen this particular brand in stock since my teenage years, so I bought three cans and plan to stock up on more next time I’m there. It was great for my 15-year old face, I’m sure it’ll be better for my 35-year old face. If it doesn’t work out, I’m well stocked for Halloween.
So after I finish this blog entry, I suppose I’ll spend some extra time in the bathroom, primping and preening. Tom (our cat) will probably join me and lick his ass in a show of support. Since I’ve been a little bored lately, maybe I’ll do one of those ridiculous comparison tests… kind of like the guy a number of years ago that ran around in a television commercial with two kinds of shampoo on his head and told everyone how much one of them tingled. Now that I look back, that was kind of weird. He looked like he had been through a car wash. I’m way too vain to have half bright white/half dull white teeth, so maybe I’ll compare shaving creams.