Ponderings and Musings

The other day I told Earl that I was seriously questioning the value that being on Facebook brings to my life. On one hand, connecting to friends and family through Facebook allows me to connect to those I haven’t seen in a really long time and/or with those that live quite a ways away. In that regard, I think Facebook is great. However, outside of that, I’m finding Facebook to be a study in frustration lately.

First of all, why can’t I just look at my timeline in chronological order from newest to oldest. If I wanted to be part of a popularity contest I’d run in one of the many gay-themed contests that are available to the today’s homosexual or I’d go back to high school and sit at the corner table in the lunch room. It’s not my bag.

Yesterday a local friend commented that someone she is “friends” (her quotes, not mine) with on Facebook didn’t recognize her in real life and from what I remember, kind of ignored her. Well that’s not really being friendly, in my opinion. She commented that she’s going to need to weed out her friends list again and of course I shared my two cents on the subject: “if you can’t hug them, don’t friend them.” I came up with that at that moment. I’m deep like that.

I know tons of people that use Facebook to make friends. They seek out likeminded individuals and friend them, with hopes of making a connection someday. I’ve made several friends on Facebook over the years, however, I usually “friend” someone on Facebook after I’ve met them some other way, even if it’s through some other social network like Twitter or a message board or something. Generally, my rule is I won’t friend someone unless I’ve met them In Real Life or I plan on meeting them in the relatively near future (say, within the next year). And my rule, despite my use of salty language from time to time, is that I use Facebook for content that is PG-13 at the max. There are plenty of other sites for R and above, there’s no need to mingle that sort of thing with pictures of your Aunt Matilda. I friend people on Facebook because I genuinely like them or at one time I thought I liked them.

Over the past several months I’ve tried to follow some of the interest groups on Facebook: road geek stuff, maybe some gay bear stuff, etc., but I’m finding that those boards remind me way too much of the old America Online days when everything was inside of the AOL framework. I like the idea of information being free and I believe that discussions such as politics or the merits of the shape of a route marker or whether celebrity X looks better with or without facial hair belongs in a forum where everyone has access, not just to the folks that have jumped on the Facebook train. So last week I gave up on the discussion areas. I might browse a political discussion once in a while or I might “like” a subject, but I’m much more comfortable on the message boards geared for these topics. On those boards I might make friends that I would want to meet in real life, then we’d end up as friends on Facebook. That’s how I see the workflow working best for me.

I’ve been weeding out a few extraneous friend connections on Facebook on a daily basis over the past week or so and I’ll probably continue to do so through the end of the year. A while back Earl and I joined a group of guys for drinks and I introduced myself to one of the others in the party, who had absolutely no recognition of me whatsoever. He didn’t know who I was with, who I was, where I was or anything. Quite frankly he was a little standoffish. I was in my usually friendly sorts as I tried to strike up a conversation and I mentioned to him, “oh, I saw on Facebook that you’re thinking about changing careers.”

“How do you see my Facebook feed? It’s private!”. He seemed shocked.

“Uh, we’ve been friends on Facebook for several months now”, I stammered.

“Oh”. He went back to his air of quasi-disinterest. The conversational void must have been of my doing so I went back to amusing myself with watching people chew or something.

I unfriended him when we got back home. I don’t think he noticed.

Recently a “friend” went on a rant about Tim Cook not being “out” enough. That pushed me over the edge. While I fully believe that a militant-homophobe can be quite dangerous to the LGBT community, I also fully believe that a militant-homosexual can be just as dangerous. Tim Cook has never denied being gay. He doesn’t really talk about it but he doesn’t deny it. What do I care? It’s his life. Who says that a public figure needs to be wearing a neon sign and scream about gay rights every breathing moment? He’s not running around with a woman claiming to be married to her. There’s no dishonesty. Why complain from the cheap seats? Since I’m weeding out negativity in my life, I decided that I didn’t need to follow this “friend” after all. Delete delete delete.

I’ve been scolded for using the term “I’m just a guy with a husband”. I use it on several of my profiles. It’s just way I talk. I’m loud enough with my gayness, I don’t need to scream it with every online introduction. “Why don’t you say you’re gay?” My response of, “I believe being a guy with a husband is pretty much a no brainer that I’m gay” didn’t hold water in his aquarium. They’d really gasp at my old tag line of “more guy than gay.”

I’ve been scolded for not having a beard anymore. “A man that shaves is called a woman.” Aside from the implied “less than” when it comes to being a woman, my response was, “Yeah? Tell that to the soldiers keeping you safe, or the fireman that has raced into a burning home to save lives or to the pilot that landed the plane to safety while you choked for air on the oxygen mask that fell from the panel above your head, because none of them have beards either.” Besides, in the grand scheme of things, who cares what I look like? It’s my face and if I’m still getting kissed after nearly 18 years of being with my husband, I must be doing something right. As for the friend that likes to scold? Delete delete delete.

What all of this rambling boils down to is, my list of 250+ friends on Facebook is dwindling rather quickly. I have no problem with this. I’d rather just enjoy life for what it is, in the moment and share it with those that have had some sort of positive impact in my existence. As I have grown fond of saying lately, “I’m either becoming obsolete or just plain old fashioned.”

Now keep those kids off my lawn.

Tim Cook recently spoke at Auburn University as he received the Lifetime Achievement Award. I hope everyone hears the words of his speech.

So this grocery store was just a little over a mile from the house I grew up in. Sometimes it seemed like we were there once a day, tagging along with mom as we picked something up for supper that night (that might be a slight exaggeration). I always had one of those Hostess Apple Pies as a treat. As an adult I wish I still had the ability to burn all those calories.

I always liked the original sign on the front of the building. While they used to be common in communities around where I grew up (there were quite a few “Red and White”s, most of these signs are long gone. It’s great to see these in such good shape.

It’s a shame that the store has closed down. A victim of a shrinking community, it just couldn’t hold its own anymore.

At least the sign is holding up.

So if you were following my Twitter feed on Thursday night, you probably noticed that my contribution to the Twitterverse blew up starting at 8:00 p.m. (7:00 p.m. Central) in tandem with “The Sound of Music Live!” on NBC. In a way I was excited to see what NBC would do with this perennial classic, but another side of me was wondering why on earth they were trying to redo another perennial classic. Because I have a brain made of Swiss cheese, I had forgotten that it was on until Earl was flipping through channels on the television in search of “The X-Factor”. I suggested we watch this exciting live performance.

I was kind of snarky on Twitter during the presentation. Ok, I was probably more than “kind of” snarky, but the truth of the matter is, I was smart enough to refrain from posting the very inappropriate joke I made about “The X-Factor” when Earl and I decided that we needed to flip away from “The Sound of Music Live!” for a little while.

On Friday there were a bunch of people posting bunches of things about “The Sound of Music Live!” and I added my two cents to the discussion. I think this conversation was taking place on the CNN site, but it basically boiled down to this:

1. The sound mix was horrible. There was this ridiculous hissing throughout the program and I firmly believe that technology today is at a point where we should be able to get the hiss out of the sound mix before going live before millions of viewers.
2. Audra McDonald was phenomenal.
3. Carrie Underwood can certainly sing but her acting was so wooden that it was making me uncomfortable.
4. In some scenes the costume choices were quite odd. Looking at the photo at the top of this entry, you’ll notice that Maria looks like she’s singing to the children before the dash off to join her on her latest TWA flight.
5. The fact of the matter is, you either have the chops to pull off a live performance like this or you don’t. Honestly, while Carrie sounded lovely and I’m sure she put all of her heart into her performance, I don’t know that she was ready for this live play on television experience.
6. Overall I was happy that NBC tried something different and I was hoping that they would do it again sometime.

Now, a couple of folks have sent me emails telling me that I am a horrible man and who did I think I was for writing such horrible things about “The Sound of Music Live!”.

First of all, I think it’s extreme to call me a “hater”. Those that called me this pointed out that Carrie and the rest of the cast should never be compared to a Broadway show because on Broadway they have months to prepare and apparently the cast had a week (after the set was completed). Well, I’m sorry, but that NBC’s fault, not my fault. If you’re banking your Thursday night lineup on remaking a definite classic in American theatre, well, you better have your stuff together and not give yourself just a week to prepare. That just shows a lack of commitment to the production.

Secondly, I’m not the only one that thought Maria turned into a flight attendant in some sort of weird time warp of the show.

Third, I was attacked on several occasions about the play being based on “the original music, not the movie!!!!!” (with multiple exclamation points). Fair enough, if that’s the case, why was “Something Good” included in the musical numbers, when that was a song written for the movie?

And lastly, I think that someday Carrie Underwood may certainly win some sort of theatre award for her acting. I just don’t think that her first foray into this arena is award worthy. Unlike many in contemporary society, I don’t believe that everyone deserves an award for doing their job or what they’ve elected to do. I believe that you have to go above and beyond and show qualities clocking into four digit percentiles to be worthy of an award. “Participation awards” are one of the concepts that is going to be the death of this country. I refuse to applaud mediocrity and I don’t expect someone to applaud me when I am just doing what I’m suppose to do. Call me old-fashioned.

The truth of the matter is, I was excessively snarky in my Twitter stream and this is something that I recognize as a fault of mine. It’s fun to bash on that which we have no control of and people titter occasionally when we say something snarky but this is an item on my personal improvement list: I need to be less snarky. I stand by my criticisms of the show but as has been pointed out to me, I probably should have just enjoyed it for what it was.

So let me state for the record, I enjoyed “The Sound of Music Live!” for it’s spirit. I might not have thoroughly enjoyed the execution of the project, but I certainly enjoyed the heart behind it.

Perhaps I should have just focused on that.

Once upon there was a place in Oriskany, New York called Trinkaus Manor. I never went there but I drove by at Christmastime every year that Trinkaus Manor was around. They called the display “Winter Wonderland.” It was awesome and so intense that it increased their monthly electric bill by $6000. Follow the link in this paragraph for a bunch of photos or just live with this little tease (I recommend the link).

Image courtesy of trinkausmanor.com

When Trinkaus Manor burned down, many thought it was the end of the Winter Wonderland display. Luckily the decorations survived and were donated to the City of Rome, where they live on year after year. Earl and I just drove by the big “Merry Christmas” sign. It’s installed on the side of the parking garage facing Fort Stanwix. Down the street are a bunch of the other decorations that used to make up the Winter Wonderland.

Here’s a little tease.

Seeing this display year after year always help me get into the festive spirit. I’m “feeling it” now.

So I was going to write a blog entry about the fast food workers that were striking in cities across the United States today. I wrapped the blog entry around an anecdote about a Burger King in Acton, Mass. that was self-serve was back in 1989 but the whole thing wasn’t going where I wanted it to so I just bagged the entry.

So what was I trying to say? I don’t know. Work hard. Fight for what you believe in. But always keep in mind that you can always be replaced by automation. Small chunks. Grow in a steady, upward motion.

See? I got nothing.

So this is Gal Gadot, the actress selected to play Wonder Woman in the untitled movie coming out in 2015. Said movie also features Henry Cavill returning as Superman and Ben Affleck as Batman.

I’m sorry, but I don’t see how Ms. Gadot can fill what many have affectionally called the “bullet tits”. Ok, maybe I’m the only one that’s called Wonder Woman’s costume that.

Here’s the thing, a lot of people remember Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman from the 1970s television show. That’s what the general public knows as Wonder Woman. Yes, she’s done a whole lot more in her comics, but when Joe Blow thinks of Wonder Woman, he thinks of Lynda Carter.

Someone needs to give Ms. Gadot directions to the closest Krispy-Kreme. Stat. Personally I don’t think this is a good choice but what do I know? I know that I would rather see Jennifer Lawrence or Lucy Lawless in the role, but again, what do I know?

I’ll probably wait until the end of 2015 when the movie comes out on iTunes.