March 10, 2007

St. Petersburg, Florida.

St. Petersburg, Florida.

Originally uploaded by macwarriorny.

Earl and I were on the road bright and early this morning, continuing our journey south. We are not due at Disney until Sunday afternoon, and since we made such good time yesterday we are way ahead of schedule. What to do, what to do.

Drive to the Greater Tampa Area, of course.

Before I continue, memo to self: bring phone number of cousin and high school friend whenever we think of heading to the sunshine state. We can still leave Anita Bryant’s pie at home though, she doesn’t live here.

Earl and I have set up for the night in St. Petersburg, Florida. Neither of us have been here before, though Earl has been to Tampa several times. The drive was beautiful and fast (traffic on I-75 was moving at nearly 85 MPH, which was great fun). We poked around the bayfront area, including The Pier. If you’re in the area, we both recommend the restaurant “Fresco”, the food is very good and it’s nice to sit on the waterfront while enjoying your meal. My lettuce wedge had “Maytag Blue Cheese” on it. I don’t know what that is but I really hope it didn’t involve a Maytag repairman or an old washing machine.

Tonight we’re going to relax a bit and then maybe go exploring the nightlife.

When Is It Enough?

Have I got a tip for you. If you’re in the market for a vasectomy and are anywhere in Florida, Dr. Doody-doody has 20 offices between Gainesville and Miami that can do that deed, without a scalpel or needles and for only $290! Installment payments available! Don’t believe me? Drive down Interstate 75 from Georgia southward and you’ll see huge billboards proclaiming said “deal”, complete with a full color picture of the doctor, who looks so creepy it’s not hard to believe that he likes to play “snip snip” around men’s balls.

God Bring Back South Of The Border!

When will the medical related advertisements go too far? It’s bad enough that we have to see someone’s nasty leg plastered on a movie screen to entice us to have varicose vein surgery. For crying out loud we just want to see the Fantastic Four trailer. I don’t need to see someone’s spindly, hairy leg with magic marker marks all over it while I’m trying to eat my Raisinettes.

And of course now we’ve become such an exceedingly lazy society that we need medication to help us take a dump. Just watch Lifetime or TV Land during the day sometime. Hour after hour you’ll see a medication that “doesn’t make you go, but it does make it more comfortable when you do.” Are you fscking kidding me? Human beings have been dumping for eons but now it’s uncomfortable for us to do it so we we’re urged to take medicine to make it just fall out.

The world has lost it’s mind.