Bald Sense.

Last week I was working on an IT project at work which involved going around to different workstations through the building to do some reconfiguring. What I do is basically shove user X out of the way, let them know I’ll only be a few minutes while I click around on their desktop, do my magic and then move on to the next computer. This leaves the user little to do so they watch me do my voodoo, undoubtedly trying to learn my secrets. (“I shall never tell, NEVER!”)

While I was working on one user’s computer, we made the usual small talk. She then asked me why I shave my head.

I gave her my standard answer, “Because I don’t like being bald.” Her response was “Huh?”

Now I let me explain. When I have hair, I have very light fuzz left on top of my head, with a dark covering of fuzz around the sides and back. My days of a fierce red flattop are over. I don’t like the look of going bald. It makes me look old and makes me feel old. By shaving my head, I’m telling the world, I choose to be bald. I thumb my nose at the regression of my hair line. When the hairs started leaving, I evicted the rest of them. So there!

She then asked me the standard questions about maintenance and such. Do you have to shave your head every day (yes), does it take a long time (no), how do you do it (in the shower, without a mirror), have you ever cut yourself (never, and I’ve been shaving my head since ’97), what do you use (shaving cream and a Mach III), no electric razor? (in the shower?).

“Well, why do you have a beard? Especially since you have a shaved head.”, she then inquired.

“Because I hate shaving.”