June 2004

As Earl and I prepare for our trip to the Midwest on Friday, I can’t help but notice that I am continuting to try to make life simpler. No, we’re not looking for a Paris and Nicole experience while we’re in the nation’s heartland, but rather, we’re just looking for something a little less frantic than the hyper Northeast pace that we’ve become used to.

Back in April, I had the opportunity to travel to northwest Iowa for software training for work. The company is situated in the village of Emmetsburg, a “two stop light town” that is devoid of Wal*Mart, Target and even McDonalds. They did have fast food – a Pizza Hut and the always welcome classic A&W. Natives of Emmetsburg claim that they had four tourist attractions… soybeans on the left and corn on the right, corn on the left and beans on the right, beans on the left and beans on the right and corn on the left and corn on the right. I only spent three days in Emmetsburg, but every single person I crossed paths with was so friendly. People smiled. There was a “howdy neighbor” atmosphere going on, and they even made this boy from Upstate N.Y. feel welcome.

As I’ve been going on in my blog for the past couple of weeks, I need a little bit simpler approach to life. As of late I’ve accepted Wal*Mart back into my shopping experiences. I’m using MSN 9 for my e-mail and my internet browser. (It’s just easier to use software that is packaged neatly together. I’m sick of fighting with my operating system to browse the internet. I want something that just works. I know, I should get an iMac, but that’s not in the budget right now, so I’m doing the best I can with what I have.) Earl and I shun the “sit-down fast food” (TGIFridays/Applebees/et al) and go for the Mom and Pop diner with the opportunity presents itself.

I’ve given up my fancy gel pens at work and have switched to the tried and true Bic ball-point pens. I don’t take the time for “pretty penmanship”. I write functionally, but not pretty.

I’ve stopped trying to fit everyone and anything into categories of my own design. I let the pieces fall where they may fall. I allow myself to see people as they want to be seen, not as I want to see them.

I’ve disabled my webcams for a while. I’ll still videochat with others on MSN Messenger, but I’ve received one too many ‘requests’ of what I should do under my desk while I’m doing my work, so for now, I’ve decided to shut down the cam streams.

And I’m trying to stop living life as “what it could have been” and start living “as it is.” A stop and smell the roses sort of attitude. It’s not so bad after all.

I’m really looking forward to the Jeep ride to Oklahoma, Texas, Kansas, Missouri and Nebraska (and back). I want to see flat lands, big farms, small towns, large cities and blue sky. I don’t want a soda, I want a POP.

I’ve been on an internal emotional roller coaster the past couple of weeks. But the turbulent ride has come to an end. And I really like the looks of this stop.

For some reason I decided this weekend that stereotypes are bad. It’s kind of like I woke up and said to myself, “I shouldn’t be such a shithead.” Usually epiphanies are a glorious feeling, not laced with profanities, but sometimes you can’t have everything work out the right way.

For example, I’ve always presumed that shoppers at Wal*Mart have two-digit IQs. I looked down upon those who shopped at Wal*Mart. They’re the dumb ones. “I’m better than you, I shop at Kaufmann’s and spend way too much money needlessly”. “You’re spending good money with a jerk of a company who kills small-town America.” “You’re buying cheaply made goods that were manufactured in sweat shops in Asia.” “You can’t earn a decent living so you have to shop at Wal*Mart”. How rude!

Earl and I shopped in Wal*Mart yesterday. Honestly, I hadn’t been in our local Wal*Mart in a number of years. The first in the area, it’s in the process of becoming a Wal*Mart Supercenter.

As we were opening the pool yesterday, we found we needed pool supplies. Being Sunday, none of the local pool supply shops were open, but Wal*Mart was there, with all the supplies that we needed. The sales staff was friendly. Our cashier had two lockets around her neck, both with pictures of her very young son. She seemed like the single, struggling mother type. Before my epiphany, I would have considered her a stupid fool who got knocked up and was living off welfare. Truth be known, she was a hard working Mom trying to earn a decent living so that her son could have a decent life. There’s nothing wrong with that. I looked her in the eyes and wished her a good day. She probably thought I was weird, but she smiled.

I’m seriously considering venturing into the Wal*Mart Supercenter across town for groceries next time we go shopping.

When I was a vegetarian, I probably was a little more preachy than I needed to do be. Did I consider myself better than those that ate meat? Admittedly, I did. How arrogant! Then I ask myself, was I a vegetarian to maintain a ‘holier-than-thou’ stance, or was I a vegetarian for health reasons? Honestly, I don’t know. I have met a few vegetarians that were just plain mean with their preachiness. I don’t want to be like them. I guess it doesn’t matter now, since I’m not vegetarian anymore, but I think I’ve learned a lesson somewhere in there.

I am a very fortunate person. I’m blissfully in love, have a beautiful home, enjoy a caring and understanding family and work with a great bunch of people. My life is ideal. It’s time to put aside my artifically earned superiority and appreciate people for who and what they are.