I just paid $4.029 for a gallon of gas at the convenience store down the street.
Ironically, tomorrow we pick up Earl’s new company car. It’s an SUV; a Dodge Durango.
God Bless America.
Why.
American Idol: Top 12.
So I’m going to try blogging while I’m watching American Idol. I’m currently watching it in TiVo time delay. I’m not going to edit; I’m just going to jot down notes and post them at the end of the show. They are singing Lennon/McCartney tracks for the first time.
1. Syesha Mercado. “Got To Get You Into My Life”. Wow, pitch is all over the place, she’s nervous. I’m not impressed.
2. Chikezie. “She’s A Woman”. I don’t remember a Beatles hoe down song. He’s in tune. I’m having Taylor Hicks déjà vu with the arrangement of the track. Soul Patrol! Not too bad, the ball squeezed note at the end was quite decent. I’m somewhat impressed.
Paula seems somewhat “grounded” tonight. WTF. Ryan Seacrest needs to learn the meaning of the phrase “non-partiality” as he rubs Chikezie’s head.
3. Ramiele Malubay. “In My Life”. First thought – Deniece Williams or Stephanie Mills sounding voice. The little person fills the stage very well. I thought she did very well, and I haven’t been a fan of hers. I don’t really agree with the judges.
4. Jason Castro. “If I Fell”. I’m not caring for the unplugged approach to the performances this season. I don’t believe it allows us to focus on the vocals nor does it level the playing field amongst the contestants. On the other hand, I found his vocals to be pretty good and they fit his appearance well. He doesn’t blow my skirt up or anything, maybe I don’t get him.
5. Carly Smithson. “Come Together”. I think it’s a well established fact that I love me Irish. Carly is no exception. I like her take of this song and I find her vocals flawless. She could easily make this a single and do well on an active rock station. I think she’ll be in the final two with David Archuletta.
6. David Cook. “Eleanor Rigby”. (Not a fan of his hairstyle). He’s holding back too much and his pitch accuracy is missing. I’m not enjoying the performance at all. His take on the chorus of the song was kind of good, but I HATED the verse.
Wouldn’t it be groovy if one of the contestants sang the Stars on 45 medley of Beatles tracks?
7. Brooke White. “Let It Be”. She doesn’t seem confident playing the piano tonight. I’m not one to talk, but if you’re going to sing and play piano simultaneously you can’t look at the keys. She’s struggling, both vocally and with the showmanship aspect of her performance. She’s missing quite a few notes with pitch issues. Mumbled words. I like her, but I’m disappointed. I think she knows she blew it.
Crimminy, here Ryan goes with the shoes and feet again.
I don’t like the new American Idol graphic used before commercials. It looks bare without the oval.
8. David Hernandez. “I Saw Her Standing There”. I don’t remember “pizza bistro” being a wink-wink code for “gay bar strip club”. His vocals are decent but I don’t find him to be suited to this type of music. He’s trying too hard.
9. Amanda Overmyer. “You Can’t Do That”. She’s a natural on the stage. I love the way she approaches a track and she definitely has her own style. Not sure it’s marketable in today’s pop climate. Her embellishing on the melody is impressive. She reminds me of a girl I went to college with. Her name was Kayleigh.
I’m glad Simon told Paula to shut up. She needs another distemper shot.
10. Michael Johns. “Across The Universe”. (I prefer Carly’s Irish accent, but that’s probably predictable). He totally reminds me of Michael Hutchence. The performance is not engaging me but the vocals are good. Kind of boring.
11. Kristy Lee Cook. “Eight Days A Week”. Not liking the country spin of the track at all. It doesn’t twang well, though she is nailing the vocals for what it is. Paula was on target with her comments. It reminded me of Carmen Rasmusen.
I really dislike Ryan Seacrest. I twittered the he would be hot naked if he had a gag in his mouth. I was wrong. Even that wouldn’t be hot.
Quick aside during the commercial, the Bimbo Jones remix of Yoko Ono’s “You’re The One” is actually quite fun.
12. David Archuleta. “We Can Work It Out”. Wonder boy forgot the words! He’s stressing himself out way too much. His weakest performance of the competition, still an excellent performer.
People Are Still Having Sex.
Here we go with another sex scandal in the media. The “journalists” are jumping with glee as it was revealed today that New York Governor Spitzer talked with a prostitute on a wire-tapped phone.
Oh, by the way, five U.S. soldiers died in Baghdad today. But that’s not so important as to the whereabouts of Governor Spitzer’s dick. God bless the soldiers; their sacrifice was so important they were reduced to page two of the newspaper or the ticker along the bottom of the 24 hour propaganda channel. The media outlets make me feel so informed on the important stuff.
Of course there’s all sorts of politicians calling for the resignation of the governor. Please. I don’t know what having sex with an extracurricular person has to do with running a state. I don’t see the relation between the two, but then again, I’m most likely looking at a different big picture than most.
Sex is not bad. Sex is not dirty. Sex is a natural act. Get over it already.
Melancholy.
I made a video after not doing as well as I expected on an exam. I get a little ranty about other things.
[MEDIA=49]Click.
A couple of years ago CBS cancelled the show “Judging Amy”. I was bitter about it, wrote several letters and blog entries on the subject, raised some hell with the CBS e-mail servers and then let it lie. By the way, the show is not out on DVD yet because Fox and CBS are arguing over compensation.
This past week NBC announced the cancellation of “Las Vegas”. The series finale is a cliffhanger that wasn’t suppose to be a cliffhanger but the writer’s strike messed all that up and now there’s no scheduled resolution to the dangling storylines.
I don’t watch a lot of network television. With my recent dismissal of “American Idol” (the unbelievable praise of the vocalists singing key changes [what the hell], out of tune performances and “runs” was giving me gas) and the aforementioned cancellation of “Las Vegas”, my consumption of network television viewing has been weeded down to one show: “Private Practice”. I probably should do some research to see if that’s been cancelled as well as I haven’t seen it pop up on the TiVo lately.
Now that I think of it, we can save $10 a month by getting the networks removed from the satellite service. Perhaps I should look into that.
Who’s The Fool.
Earl and I are watching the Top 24 “ladies night” on American Idol. So far the first two performers have done their thing, the crowd is going wild for lackluster, mundane, uninspired performances.
I feel like I’m wasting my time.
And this trend of the audience booing anything that’s a remotely negative comment from the judges is absolutely ridiculous. American Idol needs to get back to their roots and let these folks sing with little in the way of accompaniment and no audience for this stage of the game.
And while I’m cranking on this show, they made a mistake keeping the “plus-sized model” (who keeps reminding us that she is a “plus-sized model”, what’s that got to do with her singing voice? She’s no Martha Wash!) and getting rid of the other girl that could really sing.
I really am wasting my time and your time with this blog entry.
Time to click through the TiVo. Maybe the chipmunk version will be more entertaining.
Enough Speaking.
I guess I’m in a little bit of a ranty mood today. Am I the only one that is sick and tired of hearing the antics of Britney Spears and her clan of idiots? I’ve never found her to be exceptionally talented and back when her first song came out I was very hesitant to play it on the radio. I believe my comment was “Wow, technology can do wondrous things!”
I realise1 that a good chunk of the American sheep have become obsessed with all things Hollywood. I know that it’s apparently very important to know which celebrity showed her cooley as she staggered out of the limo last night. Personally I believe that Paris Hilton is the anti-Christ that the wingnuts are always shrieking about.
Here’s my take on this Britney thing. Who cares if she shaved her head months ago. Did the country go whacko years ago when Tyne Daly did the same thing? Of course not. Is Britney a responsible mother? Probably not. Neither is a good chunk of mothers out there today but we don’t see everyone losing2 their mind over it. There’s always going to be good mothers and there’s always going to be bad mothers. It’s just the way it is. Crimminy.
The newest five alarm fire is that she’s speaking in a British accent. Big whoopin’ doopin’ doo. Has anyone thought that she might have wanted to reboot her life or even just a change of pace? I know that if I grew up with that southern accent that she’s had all her life I’d be out making a change too. Truth be known if I could pull of a believable Irish accent I’d do it full-time. “The British accent shows that she has a personality disorder.” Give me a fscking break. Maybe she was just sick of sounding like a hick.
I realise1 that the media wants us to pretend that there’s no war and all is rosy in the United States. Celebrity deconstruction sells ad time much better than world annihilation. But enough already with the Britney talk. Let her be.
Bollocks!
1 Since I can’t speak with a convincing Irish accent, I type with one.
2 As long as I’m ranting, for the love of god please note that ‘lose’ is spelled with one ‘o’. “I’m losing weight so my jeans will be loose.” Loose as in “loose change” = two ‘o’s. Lose as in “lose the sidekick” = one ‘o’. Thank you.
Moby gets credit for inspiring me to superscript my numbered notes.
Can’t Do It.
I was going to write a witty blog entry regarding Sherri Shepherd’s (“The View”) latest revelation. But that would just be mean.
Joyous Juanita.
A couple of years ago there was a big hullabaloo about the big box retailers using “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas” on their signs, sales and other joyous ways of prompting you to spend money. I believe it was the Christian right that was having such a fit about the use of “Happy Holidays”, regardless of the fact that Christmas was sort of ‘borrowed’ from the Pagan Winter Solstice celebrations and modified for Christian use (some believe Jesus Christ was actually born in June), much like the other holidays that are sprinkled throughout the year. The argument apparently lingers on this year and will most likely continue to do so, like a bad fruitcake that comes back year after year to haunt you.
I couldn’t care less about what people say to me when they wish me good tidings this holiday season, but in the spirit of trying not to offend anyone, I’ve decided that I’m going to wish everyone a “Joyous Juanita” this season. I really don’t know why I’ve picked this particular phrase. I guess the word “Juanita” looks holidayish to me. I can easily picture the word decorated with holly and maybe a few berries. I don’t know anyone named Juanita, aside from a fifth grade teacher from my childhood who’s real name was “Rotten Totten”. I was never in her class though so I don’t count her.
I believe Earl has already ordered the holiday cards for the season though, so I guess I’ll have to make like Sears and print some hastily made “Joyous Juanita” inserts to slip into each card before we send them out.
Personally I find this argument to be incredibly ridiculous and that’s why I’ve decided to do my own thing. If I really like you, I might follow it up with a “Blessed Be.” Just don’t get offended if I do.
Flashing Jesus.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Everyone in the neighborhood (except us) has begun the task of decorating their homes in the spirit of the holiday in as many crass, tacky and cheesy ways as possible.
I’ve mentioned before that the neighbors enjoy lighting up their house beyond belief. Said house is a year-round mess in serious need of repair. They still have bats and witches on display, which have been tossed aside haphazardly for their Christmas display. Every year Freakboy and his ugly sisterwife (probably not their real names) throw gargantuan blow up ornaments all over the lawn and surround them with lights of every size, shade and hue, none of which match. This year they’ve added some new trinkets to the wild mish-mash of color, including a blow-up manger scene. Nothing says “Merry Christmas” like a puffed up Joseph and three puffy wise men. They’ve also added “animation” to the horrific affair by making things blink. Randomly. Everything blinks randomly. In fact, I believe they’ve hooked some of the blow up things into the blinking mechanism because the giant Santa Claus that appears to be molesting Mary also seems to be breathing hard. (I haven’t figured out why Santa Claus and Frosty are both standing at the manger yet). There he is, Santa Claus standing erect, deflated, erect, a little deflated, up and down in time with the lights while simultaneously groping The Virgin Mother. The baby Jesus keeps time by flashing on and off as Santa breathes hard while groping Mary. Why have a baby in a manger when you can have a baby with pizazz and make him blink on and off?
I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.
