March 9, 2017

DST Again.

We were reminded at work today that Daylight Saving Time starts in the United States this Sunday at 0200. For those that don’t know what Daylight Saving Time is, it is an outdated practice of moving the clocks forward one hour to fool simple minded people into thinking that they’re getting an extra hour of sunlight everyday, thereby reinforcing the outdated thinking that humans should be enslaved to a man made concept of time and should only play when they are told to play and only work when they are told to work. Anyone with an IQ that exceeds a typical Interstate speed limit will tell you that the days of Daylight Saving Time has long outlived its usefulness but the sheep will baa baa baa about farmers loving it (they don’t), the energy savings that results from the change (energy use actually goes up) and that people are happier because they days are longer (who can be happy when we have Trump as President of the United States?).

We used to start Daylight Saving Time in mid April back when people were a bit more sane but then Baby Bush decided that it would be better to start it the second week of March. I don’t know what it’s doing in the rest of the country in the first half of March, and quite frankly, I don’t really care what it’s doing, but there’s a really good chance that the wind chill factor in these parts are going to be below zero and that we will have low visibility due to lake effect snow storms. Since we are suddenly on Daylight Saving Time on Sunday, I want every proponent of this idiotic messing around with the clocks, be it child, parent, grandparent or just plain imbecile, outside at 7:00 PM on Sunday evening enjoying their “extra hour of sunlight”. I don’t care that it’s minus 10 degrees Fahrenheit or that the snow is up to their tits, they want the “extra” sunlight, they better get their asses out there and enjoy it.

Me? I’m going to be in some jet lag induced fog until November when we stop trying to play God and actually rise and set with the actual sun instead of some man made measurement of time that doesn’t correspond with the position of the sun in the sky like we used to do for the past two or three thousand years. I’m going to be inside keeping warm and trying to decide if my Honeycomb cereal is lunch or dinner because God knows what time it will really be. I’ll be late for work on Monday morning and when I do get myself situated to actually work I won’t do much but ponder about the fact that I’m tired, I have no motivation and I really don’t have any interest in associating with someone that is all joyful because their simple mind has been fooled into thinking they have an “extra hour of sunlight” in their day.

If you want an extra hour of sunlight, get up earlier and get out of work earlier. Stop trying to dictate why the rest of the world has to play your stupid game of “easily fooled” just because your intelligence level is that of a mouth breather. I’m so tired of playing this “cater to the common lowest denominator” game. 

And while I’m ranting, if I have to endure one more idiot announce that they’ve set a meeting for “1:00 PM Eastern Standard Time” when it’s in the middle of July, I’m going to take their moronic nomenclature literally and join the meeting at “1:00 PM Eastern Standard Time”, which, for those that are have the attention span of a gnat, is actually “2:00 PM Eastern Daylight Time”.  Throwing in “standard time” to the time zone when you’re scheduling meetings is a futile attempt at trying to sound professional when in fact it makes you look like a big fat goon. I hope you choke on your donut.

If you think Daylight Saving Time is a great idea, you’re an idiot. You’re part of the problem. You have no solution and quite frankly you’re taking up too much space.